“You wanna dress up like a princess, baby?” Bryan asked me with a soft, sweet look on his face.
“Yes,” I said with a smile spread wide on my face.
“I’ll make it happen next time. I promise.”
He pulled me into his side.
The next few hours were spent going room to room and talking to all of the kids. It was so amazing to see the strength in all of them. They didn’t let the fact that they were sick get them down. And you could tell they were really excited to see the guys there. A few of them shared secret handshakes, which let me know this was something they did often.
I read some stories and even ended up attempting to paint some nails. I wasn’t great, but they didn’t seem to mind all the excess paint all over their fingers.
“Thank you,” I said after it was over and we were standing next to his bike.
“I kind of figured you needed it as much as them.”
He wasn’t wrong.
Maybe I had been lost. But I was slowly starting to find my way with a little help from him.
It turned out the day wasn’t over.
He took me to a hair salon and told me to get whatever I wanted done. I was nervous and I hated that he was paying for it, but the look on his face told me not to argue.
I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do. I could cut it all off and start fresh. Maybe even find a new look. But in the end, I decided to keep the long hair and go a shade in between the golden blonde I had before and the ash blonde I was naturally.
“You look beautiful,” he said the moment I walked up to him. And he kissed me like he was trying to prove that point. “Now, you ready for dinner?”
“I could eat. What do you have in mind?”
“Cami told me about a place,” he said cryptically.
I shrugged and decided that I was along for the ride.
But when he stopped outside of the Phoenix Fire Café, I started to feel a little dizzy and unsure.
I understood what he was trying to do and I really hated to let him down.
But I wasn’t that girl anymore. And I thought that maybe I never really had been.
It didn’t matter that we were dressed the way we were because places around here added casual to pretty much everything. You could eat at upscale restaurants wearing jeans and no one would care. I also had a feeling it wouldn’t matter because Bryan would get a table no matter what, that was just the kind of guy he was. He didn’t give a crap what people thought. Even though I didn’t really see him eating at a place like this. He was clearly doing this for me.
Really, none of that mattered. Not that I didn’t feel made-up enough to walk in there or that I could run into someone I might know. And it wasn’t that I was ashamed to be seen with Bryan because that hadn’t even entered into my mind as I sat there and stared at the golden phoenix that was on the door.
“What is it?” he asked as he half-turned to look at me.
Maybe the fact that I hadn’t made a move to get off the bike had been a dead giveaway to my hesitation. He seemed so excited about this idea that I really hated to tell him this wasn’t what I wanted. And I didn’t want him to think it was for all the reasons that weren’t true.
“Cami said you love this place.”
“I used to. Maybe. I don’t know,” I said and bit my lip.
“Okay,” he said slowly. “Tell me what’s going on here.”
“I don’t want to go to some fancy place and eat a salad.”
“Well then don’t get a salad. I’m sure there’s other shit on the menu.”
“No,” I said and let out a frustrated breath. “I don’t want to eat here at all. Can’t we just go get burgers or tacos or something normal? This isn’t me. This isn’t… us.”
