"Okay, I'm in."
Henderson stares at me, still holding onto my hands. "Just like that?"
I shrug. "Just like that. I make decisions quickly. Some call it impulsive. I prefer to think of it as decisive. Plus, I really love being here. I love the people and the feel of this place. I don't want to leave."
You. I don't want to leave you.
But I'll have to get over that pipe dream and be content with whatever life brings me.
Henderson clears his throat. This is getting a little awkward with him still holding onto my hands. "I've got to tell you one more thing."
Oh no. What bomb is he going to drop now?
Chapter 44: Henderson
Idrop her hands, and pace around her small dressing room. Grayson gave me a harder time than I'd expected, but he still came around. It didn't surprise me that Tabitha jumped right in. This is right up her alley. Not only that, she'll be smashing at it. There's only one thing I don't know.
If she'll take me back.
I need to tell her. It's now or never. "You were right."
"What?" She looks startled.
"You were right." I pace around the room, trying to figure out what I'm going to say next.
"Say it again. I don't think I heard you correctly."
I perch on the edge of her makeup table, facing Tabitha. "You were right. I wasn't accepting of love because I was too afraid. Afraid of wanting it—needing it—and being rejected. It was easier to reject it right off the bat than to put myself out there and be shot down."
Watching her for the past two weeks made me realize this. My whole life, I've been rejected. My mum, my dad, my career. I couldn't bear to be rejected by Tabitha too.
"But if you risk nothing, you win nothing," she says so matter-of-factly.
"And you lose nothing."
"You lose everything."
She's right, of course. Without her, nothing else mattered because I felt as if I'd already lost. "It used to be enough, what I had. Until I met you. I never saw myself falling in love. Being in love. Let's face it, I never had a clear vision of what love should be. To me, love was destructive and hurtful. Love didn't build you up. It tore you down. But now I see things differently. And everything I envision contains you. I can't see myself being anywhere but with you. In love with you. Forever."
Her mouth opens as a gasp escapes her perfect lips. "You … lo … love me?"
I lift my shoulders and then let them drop. "I think I do."
She folds her arms across her chest. "I'm going to need you to prove it to me."
"More than offering you the perfect job?"
She nods. "You messed up. Me taking the job here and working with you on Josh's show helps you out probably even more than it helps me. I need proof that you're willing to risk it, just as much as I am."
I bob my head up and down in agreement. "Anything."
Tabitha takes one, two, three steps toward me, closing the distance until our bodies are centimeters apart. I sit up tall, the scent of her filling my nostrils. I shove my hands deeper in my pockets, lest I embrace her before she wants me to.
God, I hope she wants me to.
Tabitha takes a finger and runs it lightly up and down my chest. "You see, Henderson, ever since the first night we met, I've been opening myself up to you. I don't know why. It certainly wasn't your bright and chipper personality. But still, I've put myself out there, and I don't feel that you've always taken the same risks."
She's not wrong.
