I wasn’t even this nervous when I made my first ClikClak. I’ve never had a good poker face, and I’m afraid—somehow—people will know that I slept with Callaghan Entay all those years ago.
I don’t want people to go digging about my time at IU. I don’t want them to know I knew him. I don’t want anyone to put two and two together about what happened after.
It’s embarrassing, really.
I stand up and shake my head and my shoulders, jogging a little in place. Not that different from what I used to do on the sidelines while I was waiting to sub in. That’s a good mindset to be in. I’ve got to have my best game face on.
After wasting too much time, I’m finally ready. I sit down, turn on my ring light, clear my throat, and use my best deadpan, expressionless voice as I start recording.
Today’s hot take comes courtesy of the United States Soccer League’s Callaghan Entay.
I play the video of him in the background.
After the Boston Buzzards lost in the semifinals to the Miami Wave, goaltender Callaghan Entay was recorded doing the following: while taking pictures with fans, Callaghan refused to smile, stating that the Buzzards’ performance was nothing to smile about. Following this encounter, Callaghan went on to give one of the least motivational speeches in the history of motivational speeches to the men’s soccer team at Indiana University, where he is an alumnus. Apparently, he’s taking the dark and brooding thing to the next level. So, following the sage advice of Cally—er—Callaghan Entay, I will refuse to smile until my account grows by ten thousand followers. Until then, there’s nothing much to smile about.
Before I can overthink, I tag it, write my caption, and hit publish.
Only then do I start to think maybe it wasn’t the best of ideas. I definitely fumbled his name. He tolerated very few people in the world calling him Cally, for obvious reasons. There was a girl on campus who used to whine at him. “Oh, Cally, when are you going to take me out?” Naturally, I picked it up, mocking him in the same tone of voice. I remember his mouth lifting into an uncharacteristic smile.
To see a true Callaghan Entay smile was a gift.
I should definitely delete it. My hand hovers over the button, but then I relax. Eh, it’s not like anyone’s really going to see it. I won’t include it in my audition reel because I doubt there’s a demand for dry, deadpan sports news delivery. Not to mention they’d just assume I messed up his name.
It does give me the idea to do the gossip videos in the style of the original content though. If someone is drunk, I’ll pretend I am too. If someone is avoiding paparazzi in sunglasses and a hoodie, that’s how I’ll dress too. I’ll put some props on my table to reflect the mood of the video I’m featuring.
I’m a genius.
I hope that Callaghan Entay never sees this. Chances are, even if he does, he won’t remember me. It was a long time ago. He was popular on campus, and he went on to have a pro career. He even played in the British Football League—the BFL—for a while.
I’m fairly confident I take up no mental space for him. He certainly moved on quickly enough. He wasn’t smitten from the get-go. He doesn’t carry the baggage I do.
Lucky bastard.
I can only imagine the video I could do about what happened all those years ago. I shake my head and move around the apartment as if I can bob and weave around all the memories that are assaulting me.
I need to focus on my purpose. Callaghan Entay has cost me enough. Time to put him and his brooding good looks back into the past where they belong.
All I have to do is find the next big story, focus on my career, and once again, forget about him.
