Dad shook his head, smiling at me. “You two will figure it out. My thought would be treat this as you want it to be moving forward. She can tell you she doesn’t need to know information about your business if she doesn’t want to, but this is Maggie. I’d think she would be happy you talked to her. Beyond everything else, she’s a friend. If you want her to have faith in you, you have to do the same. And son, your job is to figure out what it is she wants and support her in this life so that she can get it.”
I felt a bolt to my heart. “Even if that means encouraging her to go? What if she doesn’t want to stay in Highland Falls? She’s always said she is going to leave.” I slid off the counter, turning and facing out the window to look beyond our vehicles, out at the vast line of prairie.
Dad stood, throwing an arm across my shoulders. “Yep. Even if. And Sully, just remember, if she needs to leave, you could always go with her. Your mom would cry, and I can’t say it wouldn’t suck not being able to see you as often as we do, but you go where you need to go. And if your girl needs to leave, give her the strength to do that.”
Shit, he was right. Jake and I could figure out something with the brewery if I needed to, but I’d always envisioned growing old in this town, in this house. But if I had to pick between this town and Maggie, there was no contest.
“But son, just a suggestion. You might want to help her figure out what it is she’s running from. Why is she so certain she needs to leave the place surrounded by people who love her, especially now that she has a baby on the way? Help her figure out what she wants, what she needs, and then fight the world to ensure she gets it. Just make sure you’re doing it by her side.”
He slapped me on the back a few times, then went outside, joining my mom in the yard. She threw her arms around his shoulders, kissing him square on the lips before grabbing his hand, and headed for their truck. My gut tugged, praying that Maggie and I would have that thirty-five years from now. Could I be half the husband, father, that my dad was?
I shook my head and whistled for Ranger to take him outside. Dad had given me some stuff to think about. Now just to figure out how to open up time for a conversation with Maggie when I simply wanted to get her horizontal every time she was in my presence.
Talk first, action later. I could wait. Maybe.
19
Quick Exits
Maggie
The night had been magical. I was a big fan of parties: loud music, good food, letting go with some friends. Emma and Max’s cookout was just that and more. Really, it was a housewarming, of sorts. While all fun adult beverages were off-limits to me right now, it was kind of enjoyable to sit back and watch everyone else. Emma was beaming as she talked to some friends from work. As the music got louder, I listed another good thing about living in the country was not having neighbors close enough to worry about.
Emma and her colleague, Tim, had moved out to an open space in the grass, a type of makeshift dance floor. I felt my smile stretch across my face as I saw Tim whirl Emma around and around. Emma was in her element, joy radiating out of her like a halo.
As I swayed by myself, the song changed to one from The White Buffalo. Emma and Tim slowed from their frantic twirls to end in a hug before Max claimed Emma for a dance. Eric, Tim’s partner, did the same. The couples dancing fell into a slow rhythm, moving around in the grass, lost to the music.
A pang of longing hit me square in the chest. Watching the two couples, I wanted that. I wanted that person to watch me make an ass out of myself as I danced with abandon under the stars, then grab me for a slow dance where we could be pressed up against each other, nothing between us. I wanted the person that would bring me some pain reliever in the morning when I had been a fool and overindulged before making me a greasy breakfast so that I could recover.
Pulling my eyes away from the swaying bodies, my eyes found Sully’s where he stood, leaning against the back porch where another group was gathered. He arched his brow at me in a silent question.
I shook my head, trying to indicate that everything was fine, and moved toward Max’s barn. Tears filled my eyes, and I was pissed with myself. I wanted to stay in the moment, enjoy a night with my friends. But my emotions, it seemed, were no longer my own. I felt like pregnancy was one giant hormonal roller coaster, and it pissed me off that I couldn’t control it.
“Dammit,” I muttered in frustration as I reached the back of the barn and looked at the fields.
I absentmindedly kicked some lumber Max had stacked and heard a chuckle over my shoulder. Glancing back, I saw Sully was closing in on me.
“Maggie May, what did those logs do to you?” He came to a stop in front of me, near enough to hear him, but far enough away that I couldn’t just fall on his lips.
Not that I was thinking about that. Much.
“What are you doing back here, Sully?”
“Wanted to check in on you.”
“Why?”
Sully took a few steps toward me, pausing to brush some hair back that had fallen out of my ponytail behind my ears. “Was curious why you went from looking like you were having a good time to looking like someone had just kicked your puppy.”
Looking at Sully was dangerous. It was like he could see deep into me to see what secrets I was hiding. I wanted so badly to keep a layer of protection between the two of us. I needed that wall, however thin it was. Because I knew what this was, what we were. His friendship was one I treasured. Sex with him was amazing, and I was not opposed to a repeat of that performance. But for whatever reason, I still needed that separation. This wasn’t a long-haul thing for him or for me. For Pete’s sake, I wasn’t even supposed to be here this summer. And then in a year I’d be gone anyway.
Though now that would also include a baby. Adjusted plans. It was fine. Everything was fine.
So why was it I wanted to wrap myself in this man, bury my face in the nape of his neck, and pray he never let go?
Damn it all.
“It’s nothing, Sully. Pregnancy hormones and all.”
