Jay:Don’t know. I assume they’re all desperate to find me. At least I hope they are. Next time I see Manal, I’ll say I have a new friend who loves octopuses. She’s always drawing underwater stuff so it will make sense. Then you can DM her and she won’t think you’re a stranger to me.
Aleeza:Hopefully that action will carry on to my timeline—85 percent, remember?
Jay:It’s worth a shot.
Aleeza:Yeah, I guess so.
It feels a little like we’re playing with fire. It’s one thing to get information from past Jay to figure out where present Jay is, but to have past Jay make changes to his timeline based on things I tell him could increase the differences between our worlds. Or cause a temporal paradox so big we’ll blow up the universe.
But changing the past is exactly what we’re trying to do ... Jay needs to change something in his timeline based on what we figure out in mine. He needs tonotdisappear.
I make a note to do a little more research on the physics of time. Maybe watch some movies from Dad’s list.
Aleeza:Are you single right now?
Jay:Yeah, I told you. I don’t do relationships.
Aleeza:Like ever?
Jay:I don’t know. You putting this in the podcast?
Aleeza:Not if you don’t want me to. But it’s relevant since I’ll be talking about Birdwatcher and Emma Coffey.
Jay:Okay fine. I don’t think relationships are for me. Ever.
Aleeza:Maybe you haven’t met the right person yet.
Jay:You ever been in love, Roomie?
I frown. What does that have to do with his disappearance?
Aleeza:Are we talking about you, or me?
Jay:I’m curious. If you get to know everything about me, I want to know something about you.
Aleeza:No I haven’t been in love.
Jay:What about the Alderville boyfriend?
Aleeza:I liked Chase. But it was never going to move to love. For either of us.
Maybe love isn’t for me either. Maybe I’m more like Jay than I’m willing to admit.
Jay:Okay, so maybe you’re not as idealistic as I thought you were.
I don’t know what he means, so I don’t write back. On one hand, I kind of wish he were here—physically, I mean. I need to see his body language ... to know if hereallythinks I’m nothing but a naive child. But also, there’s no way I could have this conversation with him face-to-face. I’m supposed to be investigatinghim, and instead I’m telling him things I don’t normally tell anyone. But if I don’t answer his questions, I’m not sure he’ll talk.
Jay:I just looked at your Instagram again.
Aleeza:Why?
Jay:We’re roommates. I want to see what your life is like. You’re cute. Wholesome.
He called me cute before. But notwholesome.
Aleeza:You’re mocking me.
Jay:I’m not. Truthfully. I really do think you’re cute. You’re really into octopuses, aren’t you? Your grid is full of them.
