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It had been a wonderful night, and she’d been so happy. Now this room only gave her goosebumps.
‘Come and look at the rest.’
Ten minutes later she was locking her front door, with a bag of clothes over her shoulder and the truth opening her eyes. This house no longer excited her. It was too big, too empty, too old. It was the past. Now she wanted to sell it and start again, with small and cosy, modern and easy-care. But could she afford it in Auckland’s current volatile housing market, where prices rose by the day?
Only one way to find out.
She’d talk to a real estate agent later.
CHAPTER NINE
‘WHIPPITY-DO, FINALLY HOME...’ Steph sang off-key as she let herself into Michael’s house next morning. It had been a quiet shift compared to the previous one. She’d even managed to snatch an hour and a half sleep upstairs in one of the staff bedrooms towards the end.
A yawn warned her that that wasn’t enough, but it would get her through the next hour or so while she made breakfast for everyone, and walked Zac, and checked out Michael’s leg.
Michael.
Yesterday’s incendiary kiss had been a warning. She could not continue to do this and come out unscathed. But then she’d known that when she’d decided to go for him. The only difference between before that kiss and after was that now she knew she’d be looking out for herself along the way.
Zac bounded out from the kitchen, his thick tail flipping from side to side, endangering a large ceramic pot in the entranceway.
‘Hey, good to see you too,’ she said as she rubbed his solid head. Being welcomed home was cool—and nice. ‘Thanks for choosing my door to slobber all over the other day.’
Michael was already up and in the kitchen, filling the kettle. ‘Morning. How was your night?’
‘No major emergencies for once. How about you? Get some sleep?’
He wouldn’t admit it if the pain had kept him awake but she had to ask.
‘Plenty. I’ve been out running a lap of the block, given my car an oil change, and got a cake cooking in the oven.’ His mouth was tight, his lips white, but there was mischief in his eyes.
Dropping her bag and keys on the table she grinned. ‘Good. What’re you planning on for dinner tonight?’
Two mugs with teabags in them sat on the bench.
‘Chantelle gone already?’
‘She forgot to get Aaron clean clothes last night before coming here so she had to head away early.’
Opening the fridge to get eggs, Steph spotted cooked chicken drumsticks and took one. ‘You did make dinner.’
Though there hadn’t been any chicken in that shopping yesterday.
Biting into the cold meat she felt her mouth water. ‘Yum.’
‘No, I didn’t. Apparently I have a sister who’s quite capable of cooking.’
‘Why wouldn’t she be? Look at Aaron—he’s not malnourished.’
‘Takeout food could do that.’ Scepticism resonated in his voice.
‘Come on, Michael, that’s not fair.’
Glancing across at him she felt her mouth dry. Even in loose trackies and a sweatshirt he looked delectable. Way tastier than the chicken.
‘You don’t know what you’re talking about,’ he muttered. ‘Chantelle has never been able to look after herself properly—has always had my number on speed dial...number one at that.’
‘This is the sister who’s been happy to stay here with you for the last two nights?’
‘The very one.’
‘You’re not making a lot of sense. The moment Chantelle heard about your accident she was here for you.’
Opening the fridge, she stole another drumstick. To hell with eggs on toast. This was way quicker and easier. No cleaning up after involved.
‘That did surprise me, I admit.’ He got up to make the tea. ‘It’s not like her. I’ve always been there to help her, not the other way round. Same went for Carly, my other sister, until she went to England. “Michael, sort this.” “Michael, can you do that?” Of course I’m happy to help—always have been.’
‘Not so happy being on the receiving end, though.’
Did he think he had a role to play in his sisters’ lives that only went one way? Back when she’d worked in the ED with him everyone had heard about his sisters and how he was always running around after them.
‘Maybe Chantelle’s saying thanks for everything you’ve done for her. Or maybe she’s just acting how family is supposed to—being there when you need help.’
He stirred and stirred the teabags in the boiling water. ‘You know nothing about my family.’
Putting a hand over his to stop the incessant stirring, she said, ‘Then tell me.’
I want to know about them, about you, about how you all click.
He shrugged her hand off, spooned out the teabags and added milk to the mix. ‘My dad left my mum when I was seven. I got to stay with him at weekends. He remarried and along came Carly and Chantelle. I adored them right from the first time I laid eyes on them. I finally had siblings and life was less lonely when I was hanging out at my dad’s house.’
He sank onto his chair, sipped the tea.
‘Then Dad moved on again. I was thirteen, and he told me I had to step up and take care of my sisters because he couldn’t always be there for them. I wasn’t always there for them either since they lived with their mother, and me with mine a few streets away. At least he made it convenient in that respect.’
That stank. Talk about handing over responsibility... Some parent that man had turned out to be.
Steph took her mug to the table and sat down beside Michael. ‘I can see you taking on that responsibility.’ It was Michael to a tee. Or had being handed that role forged who he’d become? Forced him to take on the persona he didn’t know how to let go of?
‘There was a time when Chantelle lived on the edge. She was irresponsible and a little bit crazy.’
‘And you haven’t accepted that might be over now?’ Hang on. ‘You don’t blame yourself?’
‘I didn’t see the bad crowd she’d got in with for what it was until it was too late.’
Yes, he was still definitely taking the fall for Chantelle. ‘Does she blame you?’
‘Of course not. But that doesn’t exonerate me. I gave my word I’d be there for my sisters no matter wha
t.’
Steph took a gulp of tea. Okay, she was probably about to get kicked out—banished to the other side of the city. But...
‘You were thirteen and the girls’ half-brother. Not their father or their mother.’ Where was that woman in all this? ‘You didn’t have to shoulder all the responsibility. And even if you thought you had to when they were young they’re adults now. They can look out for themselves.’
Michael stood up, snatched at his crutches as they started to slide towards the floor. ‘You’re wrong. It’s what I do, and what I will continue to do for Aaron as well. It’s why I live like this. There is no room for anyone else. There is no time for any more with my family and my job keeping me busy.’
Message received, loud and clear. No time for her. Minutes for kissing, even more for sex, but nothing else. Certainly not involvement. And this was the man she loved, wanted to be with for the rest of her life.
‘You don’t want a family of your own?’
Hurt filled his dark gaze even as he shook his head in denial. ‘You didn’t hear what I said?’
‘Yes, Michael, I did. But I don’t believe it all. I get it that you think you have to be there for your family. I don’t understand why you can’t have both. Others do and manage very well. It’s how families work.’ Hers did anyway.
‘Not mine.’ He started for the door.
Steph stopped him with a hand on his arm. ‘You sure that you’re not hiding behind this responsibility? That there’s not something else keeping you from finding happiness, having the life you want?’
Something slipped into his gaze which she couldn’t read, but it suggested she’d touched a raw wound.
‘Stick to your day job, Stephanie. You’re so much better at that than trying to change me into what you think I should be.’
Low blow. Probably deserved, but unfair. She loved him, and he had just closed the gate on going anywhere with that. Closed it and padlocked it. Why had she said anything? But she was always honest, no matter the consequences, and that was what she’d been just now. The price was huge, but at least she could live with herself.
