“But that’s not all. It is common knowledge that he is a…rougher lover. Marking his women.”
Fitz’s heart went cold. Because it was eerily close to the words his wife said to him the other night. That was the man his wife truly wanted. The one she had meant to meet up with in his study back in Kent.
“And choking them,” Adelaide continued.
Fitz choked.
“P-pardon. Did you say ch-choke?” Did his wife want him to choke her? Oh God. Shite. Ballocks. Bloody hell. Buggering—
A hand rested on his knee, and he flinched. “Easy, Fitzwilliam. Darling, breathe.”
He drew in a shaky breath.
“Maybe we focus on these items for now. Unfortunately, these items are tame compared to other things I’ve heard. But I’m sure it will give you plenty to try out with your little wife. Do you know any details about what exactly she is seeking?”
“Sh-she admitted she wants me to h-hurt her.” This was incredibly difficult to speak about. “During one encounter, she, urm…she asked me to use her. Roughly,” he managed to scrape out, though it sounded like someone had gripped him by the ballocks.
Adelaide studied him thoughtfully. “Well, this is very interesting. I will help you, darling. We will show her this puppy has fangs. Don’t fret.” She leaned forward. “The most important part in all of this is communication. Understanding limits and safety.”
She paused, and he nodded to indicate he followed.
“It is of my opinion that it is always best to slowly work up to one’s limits. If she wants you to be rough with her, to mark her… You pull her hair; you use an unyielding grip—bruising—you bite her.”
Visions of their encounter in his study filled his mind. How his wife had practically purred when he had fisted her hair, controlling her with that firm touch. Perhaps he had a chance at this.
“Let her guide you if she wants it harder, if she wants more pain. And often times it is good to soothe after inflicting the pain.”
That sounded doable. And he could just confirm with her if he was doing it satisfactorily as they went along.
“Though do not continually ask her if what you are doing is to her liking.That will do nothing but kill the mood.”
Oh.
“Just think what an animal would do,” Adelaide said. “Rough intimacies are simply embracing your primal side. You need to become feral, puppy. I am sure you are capable of that.”
Feral. Right. He could do that. His want for his wife certainly felt feral. He took a sip of whisky and nearly dropped the glass. Damn his sweaty palms! The Duke probably didn’t have sweaty palms. The Duke was the epitome of feral, a beast. An ox of a man. Fitz? Fitz was a billy goat.
Lovely. He was a feral billy goat.
“Now,” Adelaide said, regaining his attention. “Things like choking require specific knowledge. You cannot simply wrap your hands around a lover’s neck.”
Fitz’s fingers tightened around the hard glass. Just the thought of wrapping his hands around Georgiana’s neck… It scared the ever-living shite out of him. He shifted in his seat. Apparently other parts of his anatomy felt differently. Other parts of his anatomy were…curious.
“Hand placement is crucial,” Adelaide was saying. “Grip and apply pressure on the side, like so.” She demonstrated on herself. “You don’t want to cut off her airway, you just want to give the semblance that you’re choking her. That’s what’s so titillating about it, the threat, the hint of harm, but not actual harm.”
Fitz stared, wide-eyed, at Adelaide. “That is titillating? F-feeling like you’re going to be killed?” And again, his cock pulsed. Should Fitz be concerned that he liked the idea of pretending to harm his wife?This cannot be normal.
“Desires practiced between consenting adults with full comprehension of what will happen is normal.”
It would seem Fitz had said that out loud. His ears burned.
She waved him over. “Come here, puppy, practice on me. I think you need to see the difference. There is a thrill in being completely in someone else’s power—when you can trust them with that. And being the one with that power. I think that could be good for you.”
Fitz put down his glass and slowly approached Adelaide. He sat next to her, leaving a generous amount of space between them. She showed him where to place his hands. He reached forward, his hand made contact with her flesh—
His body rebelled. He jerked back.
“I-I’m sorry, I can’t. I can’t touch you, Adelaide.” He sucked in a not-nearly sufficient breath. “You’re not her. I can’t.”
