And she knew Success was a basic green run. A trainer for kids and beginners. Aside from throwing yourself off a cliff, it was nearly impossible to get legitimately hurt on a gentle slope like that.
But her trauma had teeth. It clawed up her spine every time she stood at the top of a ski run, no matter how mild, no matter how tame.
But this time she had Brianna, a great instructor and trusted friend. Without Dad, it felt like the emotional stakes were lower,and Nicole might actually get out of her fear-addled head and let her body glide and slide. Even fall—just not into a tree well.
Nicole didn’t care if she let Brianna down on the slopes. They’d laugh about it. But Dad was a champion skier, and he was her father, the man whose approval and praise Nicole craved deeply.
But with her bestie, there should—theoretically, at least—be far less pressure. She hoped.
Nicole swallowed hard and got into the line for Carpenter Express. Nearby, kids in pastel helmets and instructors in matching jackets darted around her like cartoon characters, fearless and fast.
Nicole tugged at her mittens, hating how rigid her body already felt.
Brianna glanced at her and gave her a gentle nudge with the tip of her pole. “Hey. You got this.”
No, actually, shedidn’thave it.
She took a calming breath as they took their lift seats and started the move. No one who skied was immune to the beauty of a ride up the mountain. The Carpenter lift was slow and scenic, and as stunning as any of them.
All around, the sky was a bright winter blue, cloudless and peaceful. The sun lit the crystalline snow so the whole mountain sparkled like sugar. Swinging in a light breeze, they passed over tightly spaced aspens and winding trails peppered with powdery moguls.
Nicole looked down and watched skiers in the distance carving down the side of the mountain in perfect S-curves.
“You good?” Brianna grinned brightly, her excitement to get on the slopes palpable.
“No, but you’re a true friend for staying on Success with me.” Nicole nudged her. “I’m sure Empire is calling your name.”
“Oh, please.” She waved a dismissive gloved hand. “Empire will be there all season. I’d rather ski a hundred greens with you all day than rip the crazy double blacks by myself.”
Nicole rested her head on Brianna’s shoulder, grateful for such a dear friend. “I just want to be able to tell him I did it.”
“You will,” her friend said, knowing exactly who Nicole meant. “It’ll be fun, Nic.”
“Yeah? Define fun.”
“That.” Brianna pointed to the rugged ridges and hundreds of trees.
Nothing about any of that was fun anymore. It had been once—to a little girl who felt fearless and fast. A six-, seven-, eight-year-old who had the most supportive father cheering her on down every run.
Mom had skied back then, too, and they frequently went as a family. But it wasn’t Cindy’s voice she heard in her head. And it wasn’t Cindy who’d been with her the day she nearly died.
They reached the top and skied off the lift. Nicole wobbled slightly but managed to stay upright. The snow was groomed, even after a full morning of December skiing, soft but packed.
The Success trail waited just off to the right, wide and easy.
She could do this, she told herself. Anyone who’d taken one lesson could do this. A girl who’d once imagined that she would be the championship skier her father was?Shecertainly could do this.
“And we’re off,” Bri called, giving herself a push toward the trail. “Success on Success!”
This run started out like most greens—wide, open, and relatively shallow. Nicole ignored the fact that she was surrounded by kids and beginners and focused on keeping her skis somewhat parallel as she made tiny S’s in the snow and used her poles to push forward.
The run took her through some scattered trees, which Nicole tried to ignore, and then shifted into a short, steeper section before leveling out.
She skidded to a stop at the top of the hill, gulping hard.
“You got this, girl!” Bri shouted as she flew past and headed down the hill like a pro, gliding and swerving with a freakish amount of confidence and grace. “Woohoo!”
Nicole remembered when she could ski like that. As achild! She remembered the feeling of the edges of her skis slicing beautifully through the snow, the S-curves winding in her wake like something out of a YouTube tutorial.
