Lauren, who Beckett invited to stay here through the New Year when she and her mom are flying home, is sitting at the table across from her while they play a friendly game of Go-Fish. All while I stand on the porch, looking in on the life I very nearly didn’t get a chance to have, a smile on my face, a prayer of thanks in my heart.
Turning, I rest my forearms on the balcony and stare out into the fading sunlight. The cold air is nothing compared to the warmth in my heart. Never, in my entire life, have I felt so complete.
Like everything I’ve gone through has led me to this exact point.
Behind me, the door opens, and I glance back as Beckett steps out. The fading sun dances on her beautiful face, and as I always am, I’m struck by the strength that absolutely radiates from her.
Love. I love this woman completely.
As she closes the sliding glass door, I shift my gaze to look through it and see Lauren smile at something Beckett’s mom said before she gets up and joins them in the kitchen.
“You shouldn’t be out here,” I say when Beckett shivers.
“Neither should you,” she replies. She’s draped a jacket over her shoulders, but since she’s still in a sling, it’s not zipped up the front.
“I just wanted a few minutes,” I reply with a smile.
“Wanted or needed?” I can see the question in her gaze.Am I truly okay with this?
Because words won’t do any justice to the love I’m feeling in my heart, I step forward and cup the back of her head, then lower my head to press my lips to hers. Every kiss sends shockwaves of desire through me.
Need.
Ineedher.
“Wanted,” I reply. “The only thing I need is you here with me.”
She grins up at me. “You have me, Detective.”
“Baby, don’t I know it.” I kiss her again, this time deepening it until the warmth turns to an inferno inside me. “I don’tdeserve this, but I’m going to do whatever I can to prove to you that I love you more than I ever thought possible.”
It’s the first time I’ve said those words, and the weight of them settles over us.
Will she run scared?
Will she understand?
She pulls back and stares up at me, eyes filling.
I brush the hair behind her ear. “I know it’s early,” I say. “And I know you’re not ready to feel it back, but I needed you to know.”
“Not ready?” she asks with a smile. “I love you, too, Shawn. Your faith, your strength—the way you are always seeking the truth, no matter the cost. You’re one of a kind, Detective. And I am so grateful that God brought us together.”
I can’t tear my gaze from her as she says exactly what I’ve wanted to hear her say since the day we met.
“You are everything to me,” I reply. “I’m so sorry I messed it up two years ago, but?—”
“Don’t be,” she replies. “I wasn’t ready then.” Beckett leans against me, so I wrap an arm around her and hold her close. “I think I wanted to be because I was so tired of being alone, but I see now that I was still so hung up on finding the truth that I wasn’t looking for anything but a distraction.”
“And now that we know?” I’d expected her to need more time. To really sink into all that she lost. I know that she’ll never forget Paul, and I wouldn’t expect her to. He was a part of her. I don’t want to take his place. I just want a spot in her heart, too.
She lets out a breath. “I feel lighter, Shawn. Like I can finally fully move forward, you know?” She tilts her face up to me. “And getting to know Lauren is going to be a wonderful plus. It’s like keeping a part of him around. Does that make sense?”
I smile down at her, so happy that she and Paul’s daughter seem to be getting along a lot better these last three days. Thereis still work to be done between them, damage to be repaired, but they’re both working toward it. And that’s what matters.
“Absolutely,” I reply.
She grins. “I am absolutely in love with you, Shawn Sampson. Hopelessly. And I pray that this is the first of many Christmases we spend together.”
