‘Okay, everyone,’ he said, ‘I think it’s time for the topper.’
Phina and Caspy squealed in excitement and scurried over. He opened a large box, and from a fat nest of tissue paper produced an enormous, beautiful golden star. It was constructed from intricately woven wire and stuffed with what looked like vintage tinsel, which had short, almost fluffy strands but was nonetheless shiny.
‘Ah, look at that,’ said William. ‘I do love that star. My mother’s mother bought it from Harrods in 1924, and it’s topped a Lord Christmas tree every year since, even a few when they were out in India.’ Everyone nodded solemnly, and I realised that this reminiscing was part of the tradition. ‘When I was about seven, I thought it needed jazzing up, so I filled it with tinsel; a travesty, I’m sure, but my mother, God bless her, didn’t mind in the least, so there it remains. Now, as you are all aware, the youngest people present have the honour of placing the star, so if you two are ready?’
The twins had handled themselves masterfully throughout this speech, suppressing their excitement, but now it overflowed, and they shouted together:
‘Yes, yes, Grandpa, we’re ready.’
He led them up the stairs and helped them fix the star to the very top of the tree, threading through the end of the lights, which had been left loose for this purpose. As they stood back, Lando flicked off the room lights and we all marvelled at the effect. Despite our haphazard approach, the tree was a triumph. The lights twinkled gently, reflecting off the myriad baubles and trailing tinsel. The various knitted, carved and handmade decorations bobbed cheerfully, each taking its place with pride no matter how old or shabby it was, and the exquisite glass and lace creations smiled kindly at them, welcoming their humbleness as if they were royalty.
‘Well done, everyone,’ said Lando, as William led the twins back down the stairs. ‘I think we’ve outdone ourselves this year.’
‘Yes, another splendid Lord effort,’ said William, brushing what looked suspiciously like a tear from his eye. ‘Now, I have to don the red suit, I’m afraid, and go and do the evening shift at the grotto, so I’ll see you all later – or tomorrow,’ he added, ruffling Caspy’s hair. He left with Lando, who said he wanted to put in a couple of hours in his studio before going out later.
‘Come on, you two,’ I said to the twins, who were going for a sleepover that night with a family they had made friends with on their frequent visits to their uncle’s house. ‘Time to get over to your friend’s house.’
They took my hands as Xander stepped forward.
‘Actually, if it’s all right with you, Penny, I’d like to run them over – it’s been a while since we’ve had a good chinwag.’
Giggling and waggling their chins with delight at the new word, they kissed Bunny goodbye and went happily with him to collect the overnight bags I had already packed for them, leaving Bunny and me.
‘Go and sit down,’ I said, noticing how drawn she looked after the effort of the tree. ‘Can I get you anything – a drink or something to eat?’
‘I’d love a herbal tea, darling, but most of all some company. Won’t you get yourself something, too, and come and sit with me for a while? I have to go out later, but I’d love to chat.’
She went through to the living room where, after dodging around all the various occupants of the kitchen to make two cups of turmeric tea, which I had discovered I loved, I found her lying on a sofa and staring at the ceiling. She smiled when I came in and took her tea gratefully.
‘Thank you, darling, how yummy, exactly what I needed. Now tell me, how are you enjoying your Christmas holidays with us?’
‘It’s only been a couple of days, but I absolutely love it,’ I answered truthfully. ‘Everyone has been very welcoming and Phina and Caspy are just wonderful.’
‘Thank you. They really are, but it’s a lot to try to look after them when I’m so pushed with work.’
‘Oh yes, almost impossible I would have thought.’
There was a silence while we sipped our tea, and I wondered if Bunny was working up to telling me something. To my surprise, it was a question she had.
‘Pixie, sweetie, I hope you don’t think I’m intruding, but…well, I was wondering if there was anyone you were missing, maybe someone close to you that you wanted to spend Christmas with? There’s plenty of room here, you would be welcome to invite someone for a few days. Lando couldn’t care less, he sleeps in his studio half the time, anyway, and I do want everyone to be happy.’
What about you being happy?I thought, looking at her pinched expression, but not feeling quite bold enough to probe. Instead, I replied, with some relief:
‘Well, my parents are in India, so not them, although I do miss them. There was a special someone until recently, my boyfriend Timothy.’
‘Oh God,’ she said, her hand flying to her mouth. ‘He isn’tdead,is he?’
For some reason this question, reasonable enough I suppose, struck me as completely absurd, and I started laughing. And once I’d started, I found I couldn’t stop, I was shaking and gasping and felt my eyes filling up with tears and then spilling over. And then I didn’t know if I was crying with laughter or with misery and the gusts and sobs became confused, but still, I couldn’t stop. I felt a gentle hand on my shoulder and realised that Bunny was sitting next to me, patting me and murmuring soothing words. Her kindness allowed the tears to flow more calmly and then I was taking wobbly breaths and scrubbing at my face until finally I shuddered to a stop.
‘Sorry,’ I muttered, pulling out a scraggy tissue from my pocket and dabbing at my face. ‘Sorry, I’m so sorry, how embarrassing.’
‘Embarrassing?’ she asked, giving me a squeeze and then heading over to the drinks’ cabinet. ‘Darling, crying isn’t remotely embarrassing, I make a point of doing it at least once a day, it’s very cathartic. Seems to me that you haven’t been doing nearly enough of it, so promise me you’ll try harder in future.’
I nodded and summoned up a watery smile as I watched her pour a frighteningly large gin and tonic, which she then pressed into my hand.
‘Nothing nicer than a massive drink after a big cry, you’ll feel like a new woman. Now, tell me what happened to Timothy, if not dead.’
I giggled again and took a bracing sip of my drink.
