I shrugged. Mostly I felt numb, and that worked for me.
‘I have to leave early in the morning,’ I said. ‘I’ll try not to wake anyone up.’
I had gone upstairs to my bedroom, where the sight of my bags on the bed, brought up unobtrusively by my kind father, threatened to push me into tears.
Now, in the beautiful bedroom at Lyonscroft, exhausted from all the events of the past twenty-four hours, which had been crowned by Steph’s texts, I pulled up my knees and dropped my face against them, silent tears soaking into the duvet. I might have stayed this way until I fell asleep, had a weight not suddenly landed on the bed and the same comforting muzzle as earlier pushed its way into my hand.
‘Hello, Steve,’ I muttered, pulling him to me. ‘I bet you wouldn’t stand for any of this. Maybe you could be ring bearer in a frilly collar and take the attention from me.’
The door, which Steve had pushed to gain access, opened wider and Nick’s face appeared. I gave a little yelp and scrubbed at my teary eyes. Nick flushed red and beckoned awkwardly to his dog, trying not to come any further into the room.
‘Sorry about him,’ he said. ‘Come here, Steve.’
The dog’s response to this was to collapse next to me with a loud sigh and shut his eyes.
Nick edged a little further around the door.
‘Steve!’ he hissed but was magnificently ignored.
‘It’s all right,’ I said, hearing my hoarse voice and wishing he would just go. ‘I don’t mind if he stays.’
‘Are you all right?’ he asked.
I rubbed a hand over my no doubt blotchy face.
‘I’m fine, just tired – it’s been a long day. It’s okay if he stays, if you don’t mind.’
He nodded.
‘Of course. He may be stubborn and wilful and get stuck in bushes every three days, but I do know…’ He hesitated. ‘I do know how helpful he can be. Good night, then.’
He left the room abruptly and, putting my phone to one side, the messages unanswered, I switched off the light, burrowed my fingers gratefully into Steve’s soft fur, and went to sleep.
EIGHT
The next morning when I woke up, Steve had gone, and my spirits had lifted. I had slept well and now here I was at the beginning of a new job with a patient who was definitely going to be interesting, in an amazing house filled with characters. I dressed quickly and went downstairs to the kitchen where I found Angela bustling around, pots bubbling merrily on the Aga and the kettle boiling. Greg was sitting at the table, devouring a large plate of bacon and eggs.
‘Good morning!’ I said, and they returned the greeting.
‘Now, you sit down with a cuppa,’ said Angela, pouring me one. ‘I’ll only be a few minutes. What would you like? There’s a full English, porridge, toast, cereal, yoghurt…’
‘Are you sure?’ I asked. ‘I was expecting to get my own breakfast, and Marilise’s, too.’
‘I’m sure,’ she said firmly. ‘What people seem to expect of nurses! You’re here to look after Marilise, and that means it’s important to keep your own strength up and not waste it doing other people’s jobs. I daresay you’ll find living here will ask more of you than you expect, so don’t you worry about me making you breakfast. Now, what would you like?’
I grinned at Greg, who had been making amusing faces throughout his wife’s speech, and said, ‘Well, in that case I’d love some porridge, thank you.’
I sat down and sipped my tea.
‘There’s no arguing with her,’ said Greg, wiping a piece of bread around his plate and eating it with evident satisfaction. ‘And she’s right, anyway, of course.’ He winked at Angela, who batted him with a tea towel. ‘Do you normally get all the meals for your patients, then?’ he asked.
‘Yes,’ I replied. ‘And not only that. Usually, it’s just me and my patient in their home, so I do everything on top of their medical and personal care: cooking, cleaning, shopping; whatever’s needed. If I’m lucky, they’ll have a cleaner who comes in once a week, or meals on wheels delivered, but those things are a luxury.’ I smiled at their horrified faces. ‘I enjoy it, I like looking after people, but I will admit that it can be very tiring. I feel very lucky to have come here this Christmas.’
‘I think you’re a wonderful young woman,’ said Angela, pulling out a tray and putting on bowls and cutlery. ‘And it’s us who are the lucky ones. Now, this is all ready to go up, if you are?’
I put my half-drunk tea onto a space on the tray and picked it up, then went upstairs. There was a small table outside Marilise’s room which was perfect for resting the tray on while I opened the door. She was still sleeping, so I moved about the room quietly but making enough noise to rouse her, as she had instructed me to. ‘I have enough naps during the day,’ she had said. ‘So I like to be awake at eight to enjoy a bit of the morning.’
Sure enough, a few minutes later, she began stirring, and I went over to help her sit up.
