“Yes, but what do youdowhen you feel it? What about possessiveness? Fearing the person you care about is going to leave you for someone else?”
“Are you dealing with these feelings?”
“Well, no . . . but my parents did.”
Teymour sighed. “Jealousy, envy, possessiveness...these are all negative feelings and qualities we can fall into in our relationships, in anytypeof relationship.”
“They are not love,” Shilan added.
“That is true, they are not love.”
“But they go with love, they are part of the package, right? The good and the bad, the hugging and kissing, the screaming and slapping.”
Shilan scrunched her mouth to one side and narrowed her eyes at the king. “I do not believe so. Love, at leastourlove”—she squeezed her husband’s arm—“is not jealous or possessive. It is kind and understanding. Perhaps there is some jealousy and envy, from time to time...”
Ehmet wondered why she’d trailed off. He knew there was something to it, something about these negative emotions that had the ability to infiltrate and rot even the happiest sort of love, turning it to something dark and bitter.
“Yes, from time to time.” Tey chortled. “Take for example times when my lovely wife decides to stand before the windows in the nude! I find myself quite jealous then, of the birds on the other side of the glass.”
Shilan laughed heartily. “Oh yes, or when we were still working, and Teymour would bring home a delightfully gigantic new ruby or other gem, I found myself quite envious of the woman who would get to wear it...Except it always turned out to be a gift for me.”
“This is true!” Tey boomed, tears of joy leaking from the corners of his eyes.
“So, you’re saying when youknowyou’ve found your love out there in the world, those other negative feelings fade away?”
“Yes, that’s precisely what we’re saying. And if they don’t, well, either you have some introspection to do, or it’s not love at all. This is all, of course, assuming you are able to court the one who has your heart.” Shilan frowned.
“Oh yes, yes. If you are not together for one reason or another, forget about trying to tamp down the jealousy and possessiveness, for it will not cease until you’ve closed that chapter in one way or another.”
“So, you don’t think there’s any point in marriage without love?”
“No!” the Gulans shouted.
“Oh.”
“A life without love is not a life worth living, my friend.” Teymour smiled sadly at the king.
“Don’t tell the boy that! He’s sad, dear.”
“Oh, yes, of course. A life without love is a difficult life, but every moment is worth living.”
Shilan tipped her head from side to side, considering her husband’s advice.
“I think I have to go.” Ehmet stood and nearly rushed from the room. Then he remembered it would likely be a while before he saw these friends again. So, he shuffled back over to the table to thank them for their time and hug them goodbye.
That night he did not sleep, instead spending the wee hours slogging through his thoughts on love, politics, and the future.
At first light, he was back on the road.
twenty-five
Ehmet talks collateral.
The dowager queen peereddown over the railing, gazing upon her son, who stood gormlessly in the foyer. “Why are you here?”
Ehmet’s head snapped up to locate the woman behind the voice. Silently, he started up the stairs. His mother fell into step beside him. Brow furrowed, she awaited his response.
They both recognized he would not speak until they were ensconced in some chamber or other. Ehmet ushered the dowager into the tower salon a few floors below his office and closed the door.
