“Gods,eight?!”Nes’s eyes grew wider than when he mentioned the temple ruins.
“It’s true. It was back when families could have that many, before the gods disappeared and conception became so difficult.” Kas’s face heated, maybe from too much drink, maybe because he’d brought up procreation. Probably the latter.
“Well.” Nes sat for a moment, looking serene as she swirled whiskey in her glass and stared out the window. Eventually, she set her tumbler on the table and stood. “I did not knowanyof that.”
Kas’s heart dropped. She was ready to go.
“You’ve left me much to think about.” She worried her lip for a moment before retrieving the discarded glass and downing the rest of its contents.
His heart shivered.
“I do need to get to bed.”
It was early for bed, but he’d pressed his luck by forcing her into dinner, and he didn’t want to push any further. She’d heard him out. More than that, really. It could only get better from there.
Kas escorted Nesrina to the washroom, and she gazed at the massive tub.Probably imagining me in there,he chuckled. As distracted as she was, he could have popped open the panel without her noticing the mechanism. But she deserved to know how it worked, so he got her attention before reaching beneath the vanity to pull the latch.
Then, he kicked his laundry basket out of the way and reached up to open the door. Nesrina darted beneath his raised arm and into the stairwell. He expected her to disappear into the darkness, but she climbed to the second step, then turned around to face him.
Cautiously, he approached. His heartbeat picked up, and he knew she could see the rapid rise and fall of his chest. He could see hers. The tips of his boots bumped against the riser of the first step.
“May I kiss you?” His words were gravelly and tumbled out before he could scoop them back into place.
“Yes.”
Kas leaned down, forcing his hands to remain at his sides lest he get carried away. Nesrina tilted her face up, her eyes wide until the last possible moment when they fluttered closed. He shut his eyes too, and closed thedistance between them.
One chaste kiss was all he allowed himself, though restraint physically pained him. It was simple, slow, warm, and inviting. His hope was that it would function as a good prologue should, encouraging her to want to read on.
As his lips left hers, her eyes fluttered open, pupils blown wide from a combination of the dark and her desire. Nesrina’s lips parted, and she blinked, bracing her palm against the wall. “Leneteki,”she whispered.
He stood back to his full height and laughed.
Nes returned his smile before turning slowly and climbing the stairs, her fingertips trailing lightly along the wall.
“Goodnight,m’ekina.”
thirty-five
Nesrina makes a target.
FourdayslaterNesrinawas semi-successfully avoiding being alone with Kas—aside from their secret dinner and, before that, the . . . incident . . . in the library. She’d taken to referring to the situation by various names but never dared to call it what it was. Nes wouldn’t even so much asthinkthe p-word.
In addition to avoiding Kas’s presence, she found she’d also become quite the kitchen cat, constantly chasing away thoughts of him as they scurried through her mind. She’d spent time attempting to determine the meaning ofm’ekina,which he’d said to her not once, buttwiceat their dinner days before. But the word, or any variation of it, wasn’t in the Old Tongue book he’d given her. She’d checked several times. All in all, she appeared to be doing fine. But, in actuality, her thoughts and emotions had become a tangled mess that bled a consistent stream of anxiety into her system. It was making her snappy and, she assumed, rather unpleasant to be around.
Even the twins began giving her space outside of their lessons and mealtime. Mealtime, just the one, supper to be precise. Kas had stopped putting up a fight over her skipping breakfast. But he’d drawn the line at missing dinner. So, she’d continued to attend. Nesrina didn’t know what to do, had not a clue. No idea. No amount of research, no number of books or academic journals, no matter how advanced, could help her out of thisone: She loved him.
She wasn’t sure when that snuck up on her; months earlier, most likely. Though, Nes suspected she wouldn’t have been able to accept the emotion and name it before the present, regardless.
Her first significant clue was when he’d listed off all the meddling he’d done, and she found she didn’t mind much at all. His behavior was unconscionable, to be sure. She’d never let him live it down, but she found it rather... sweet. Very Kas.
Regardless of how irrational her feelings were, she had them. She loved him, and that was that. In accepting her emotions toward Kas, Nesrina had also come to realize something crucial: She was allowing herself to be haunted by a ghost.
Hothan Tarisden was a wonderful father, a talented tutor, and an accomplished academic. But he was still just a man. Nes loved Papa. She respected the fates out of him. But he had his own life, his own experiences, his own reasons for feeling the way he did about the aristocracy, and she had hers.
And that’s all right.
If he were still around and she was able to sit and speak with him openly about Lord Kahoth, her papa would likely have pressed his lips together in a disapproving manner. But she also knew the moment he met adult Kas and saw the man he’d become, Papa’s negative notions would have melted away. He would have approved of Kas, if not the match itself, and he’d have gotten over that part eventually, once he saw how happy the duke made her.
