The thought of Aulie finding that with someone else boils my blood. But it doesn’t matter. I can be angry. I can use that fuel and be miserable on the ice as long as Aulie gets the happy ending she deserves.
Below line five an arrow points to it with a little text bubble that readsthat one is too foolish. I’ll be content with a safe, stout love, after all. Was Charlotte Lucas’s ending really that tragic?
Oh no.Well, that won’t do, Dessy. You deserve fireworks and whatever happy shit is in those Jane Austen novels of yours.
With a sigh, I leave the paper on a side table littered with family photos of Gus and Aulie’s Memere, aunts and uncles, and finally return to the crew in the dining room. That list was a friendly reminder that there are other reasons I shouldn’t act on my feelings for Aulie besides her being Gus’s little sister. Mainly, she deserves the world and someone who’s nearly as good as she is, and I’m—well, me. She shouldn’t settle for someone like me instead of waiting for the great romantic hero she deserves.
“You should ask Jack.”
The sound of my name causes my steps to slow.
“No way he’s going to want to do it,” Aulie’s sweet-honey voice answers.
“You never know. Didn’t he say he’d love to help?”
“Yeah, as a joke, there’s no way he planned on actually being able to come through.”
Dependable.
The word from her list screams past my skull. But it doesn’t matter; I’m not trying to show that I can be anything for Aulie. We want different things, and above all, I want her to have the world, not take it from her.
But maybe, this list isn’t a terrible idea to keep in mind. So, I can’t be a suitor, but she deserves good people in her life, and that’s what that list was, right? Maybe it can be a bit of a moral compass for me while I’m up here, and I can show her she has someone on her side who can help her through all this.
Yup, that’s a logical explanation for why I want to incorporate those characteristics into my life.
“You never know, though. Now that he’s here, there’s not much to do, so maybe he’ll be down to help.”
“I don’t know, Emy.” Gus’s chair creaks. “I don’t think it’s his thing either.”
“But what’s the harm in asking?” Emy continues.
“No, you’re right,” Gus says, a phrase I seldom hear him use. “You should ask him, at least. Maybe he’ll be bored or something.”
“Ask me what?” I ask, finally entering the dining room. I search for Aulie in her seat, but she’s not there. My head swivels to the floor. She’s on her hands and knees cleaning up my puddle of spilled wine. Shit.
At this point, I’m not even sure I deserve this woman’s friendship.
“Nothing, it’s fine.” She waves me off.
“Aulie needs help with the fair because she’s behind on planning after caring for you,” Emy says.
Grabbing a napkin off the table, I bend to finish cleaning up the mess. “Whatever it is, count me in, Dessy.”
“No, Jack. I couldn’t possibly ask you to—” She raises her head. We’re a lot closer than we were when I started my crouch. My breath catches and echoes off the walls like it’s coming from somewhere else rather than internally. I shift my weight, leaning further back. “This isn’t your type of thing, trust me.”
“You’re so sure you know what my thing is?”
“I mean, after five years? Yeah. I have a pretty good idea. And trust me. This isn’t it. It’s fine. Emy’s just upset because I’m beyond desperate and I’m considering asking Tyler since he’s in town.”
Fucking hate that idea.
“Nah. Why torture yourself with that ass? Whatever you need, Dessy, I’ve got you.”
“Thank you,” Emy breathes out.
“I hate the prick too, but they should explain what you’re getting into before you agree, man. It’s not manual labor or something. It’s—”
“Unnecessary. I owe Dessy for taking care of me this summer and saving my life.” My gaze lands on her. Lilacs, violets, and rosewater hit my nostrils, and my heart hammers against my chest. I’d put up with just about anything if it meant keeping her away from that asshole. “And my PR team suggested I do some charity work after whatever Veronica posted, so it’s a win-win.”
