“Better not,” I grumble. “You’ll swoon right off the edge of the damn building.”
“Come here, big boy. I’ll let you hold me. Or I can hold you, whatever you prefer.”
“Using my need to touch you to your advantage, that’s low even for you.”
“I just wanted to give you a nice view for your first parade,” Natalie laughs. “We can go somewhere else.”
“Like hell we will.” I put the hot chocolates down near the ledge and slowly climb next to her. It’s a fairly wide ledge. Wide enough that Natalie is sitting criss-crossed and there’s still a foot or so of concrete before the building ends, but still. “We’re alone, and you said I get to touch you.”
This time, Natalie doesn’t just laugh. She throws her head back, the laugh and smile lighting up her face so brilliantly I finally get why she brought me here. This is the best view in the town, no question.
“Do you like me or something?” she says, looking over her shoulder with a cheeky grin.
I shrug back waiting for the invitation to put my arm around her. “Or something.”
Her head falls to my shoulder.
I wrap my hand around her waist giving her a better surface to rest on.
Her breathing slows and shoulders relax. It calms me, too. Below, people are tightly packed along Main Street. Lighted floats wait in a parking lot by the harbor. In the waters by the Christmas-lights-lined lighthouse, a smaller light flickers. Natalie said that was where Santa would start his voyage. The harbor is full of anchored boats, bobbing gently on the water. Some of the bows have Christmas trees on them. Some of them have wreaths. All of them have Christmas lights outlining their shapes in the darkness.
Wellsport loves itself some Christmas, that’s for sure.
“Caden texted me,” Natalie finally says.
“Oh.” It comes out small. A tiny puff of breath that crystallizes and disappears so quick in the cold. Right now, Caden’s a wildcard. He’s depressed, his future is hanging by athread, and I can’t tell if that’s going to make him learn and grow or become more of a selfish asshole.
Our relationship has been shit for years. The only reason I room with him is because my parents pay for our housing—we get to pocket our scholarship for room and board that way and save money for our future (if we’re smart) or spend it on…whatever Caden’s been spending it on these days. It’d be cool to have him back on my team for once.
Natalie sighs. “He said I should forgive you and give you a chance. He confessed he was playing a prank on you, but it went wrong, and then he begged you not to tell me.”
“Caden told you that? Really?”
“I just don’t understand why you agreed to keep silent.”
I sigh. This is one of those questions I don’t really have an answer to. “Honestly, I don’t know. I think initially it was an ego thing. I thought the connection was so strong it’d be clear to you soon enough, anyway. But after a while, all that became clear was that you hated me, and then it didn’t seem worth it. I watched you enough to know you didn’t have many friends other than Caden, and I know how shitty that can be. I didn’t want to risk ruining your friendship with Caden when you seemed so happy around him. Besides, I still got to see you every morning, and for a while that was enough for me.”
“Why isn’t it now? Why tell me all of this now?”
“Caden’s not coming back to school,” I say.
“So, I was going to be alone anyway,” she says.
“Yeah, and he sort of got it in his head that his leg injury is karma for everything, and he wanted to make it right.”
“Is that why you agreed to come here instead of spending Christmas with your family? For him?”
I shake my head. “I haven’t gone home over winter break since the divorce.” I keep my voice smooth and low, channeling the cocky version of myself I’ve kept as a shield around her. “I’mhere for you, D’Amore. No other reason. I want you and I’m going to win.”
Natalie lifts off my shoulder and scowls. “Drop the act.”
My mask falters. “What act?”
“I’m starting to get the sense you’re hiding from me, and I don’t like it.”
“I’m not?—”
“No. No more lying or I’ll put you on my shit list right next to your brother.”
