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Elizabeth tried to memorize the way he walked. She tried to keep in mind the slope of his face and the wicked eyes and the disheveled beard. As Gemma and the coachman crowded her, as their worried questions milled around her head, Elizabeth tried to keep in mind the face of the man who had stolen a piece of William from her.
But, as she slipped into the darkness, she promised herself that she would not allow him to steal her hope.
Chapter 1
“Would you like for me to arrange your hair in your usual style, Lady Elizabeth?”
Elizabeth lifted her gaze to meet Patience’s eyes. They were in their usual tender state. However, their brown color shimmered with a twinge of worry. Elizabeth contemplated forcing a smile onto her face to ease Patience’s mind, but she knew the girl would only see through it. So she shook her head, saying, “It does not matter to me what style I wear tonight.”
Patience sighed under her breath before she began running her deft fingers through Elizabeth’s blonde hair. Silky, silver-blonde strands tumbled out of her hold, falling down to Elizabeth’s shoulders before it was picked back up again. Patience often did that before she began styling her hair and Elizabeth liked the way her fingers felt on her scalp.
“I had hoped that you would be excited about today,” Patience said.
Elizabeth met her eyes again. “You tend to hope for useless things, Patience.”
“Yes, I suppose you are correct,” Patience agreed with a sigh. “I had hoped you would break your fast this morning, but you stubbornly remained in your bed without caring to come out from under the covers. I had hoped you would at least open the windows to let in a bit of fresh air but you only stared blankly at the ceiling as if you have lost all your will to go on.”
Elizabeth wasn’t in much of a mood to appreciate Patience’s worry. “Oh, how dramatic.”
“I do not think I am the one being dramatic,” Patience went on. Now, she was twisting Elizabeth’s hair to the top of her head, picking up pins from the vanity table. Patience was only twenty years old and yet she spoke as if she had all the wisdom of a woman who’d seen the world. It didn’t help that her russet hair—that would often slip from her chignon—softened her features and made her seem much younger than she actually was.
“I think,” Patience went on, “It does you no good to wallow.”
“Heavens,” Elizabeth murmured. “I did not think I would be subject to such nagging from someone who did not give birth to me.”
At that, Patience laughed. She had a penchant for diving headfirst into each emotion she felt without remorse. Within seconds, Patience could switch from annoyance, to happiness, to anger, to despair. It was what had drawn Elizabeth to her in the first place, when she’d first been assigned as Elizabeth’s lady’s maid two years ago following Gemma’s retirement. Gemma had left to care for her grandchildren and the current maid had filled the role gloriously.
“Are you not pleased to have such a woman as myself caring for you?” Patience sighed, putting her hands on her hips, shaking her head as if to say, “What am I to do with you?”
Elizabeth had the strength to smile this time. “Yes, I could not hope for anything better.”
She nodded decisively. “I am happy to hear that. Now, will you cheer up for the rest of the evening?”
Looking at her through the looking glass, Elizabeth widened her smile, the falseness of it practically blinding. Patience only shook her head again, more serious this time.
“You cannot blame me feeling this way, Patience,” Elizabeth sighed. It was all she could do not to declare she was ill and crawl back into her bed. “Not today of all days…”
Patience nodded, her eyes growing tender once again. “I understand.”
No one could truly understand, Elizabeth knew. Patience hadn’t been there that day. Gemma had still been her lady’s maid, and even though she’d stayed by her side after the ordeal, even Gemma couldn’t begin to grasp how Elizabeth’s heart had been broken all over again when she’d lost that ring.
Five years. It had been five years since then. Five years of being fine on the surface, while always feeling as if something was missing from her life. Five years of watching herself become a spinster. Five years of her continuing search for William and always falling short. That day had brought such hope and such pain in one fell swoop. And to this moment, Elizabeth could not forgive herself for how timidly she’d handled everything.
Had she stood up for herself, had she been bold and brave like Gemma, perhaps that man would not have dared to rob her.
Patience had only been here for two of those years. They’d grown so close in that time that Elizabeth knew Patience only wished for her ultimate happiness. But no one would understand how she’d lost a piece of herself that day.
