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With that said, he slammed the door shut, a signal to Wesley that it was time for them to leave. As the carriage pulled off, William didn’t miss Nelson’s booming laughter.
It was expected. After all, he’d said that very same thing the last time.
Chapter 17
Elizabeth told herself that she should not be saddened by the thought that she couldn’t have dinner with him tonight. When Harold had brought the news to her just an hour before, she’d told herself to think nothing of it.
Not for a second did she think she’d actually be angry.
It was irrational anger, shooting up within her like spikes. She’d eaten her dinner on her balcony alone, unable to properly appreciate the lovely spread of stars above her, but rather ruminated on the last thing William had told her, “When you are ready to tell me, I shall be in my office.”
Well, then, where are you, William? Why have you left the manor without speaking a word of it to me, and simply passed the message along through the butler?
The more she thought about it, she more upset she found herself. Before she knew it, she’d polished off her dinner without realizing she’d even eaten and after the plates were carted away, Elizabeth found herself alone with her thoughts again. She took to pacing her bedchamber, wanting and failing to calm herself down.
“I should simply retire to bed,” she said to herself. She’d asked Minnie to bring her a book to read while she unwound, but the book still laid untouched on her vanity table. “Thinking about him will only upset me even further.”
Determined, Elizabeth approached her bed, but she couldn’t find the strength to crawl under the covers. Agitation rumbled throughout her limbs, spurring her irritation. She stepped away and approached the now closed balcony doors, needing to do something to rid herself of this anxious feeling.
“If only he had informed me himself,” she mumbled. “Then I would have no reason to feel this way.”
Even as she said the words aloud, Elizabeth knew they did not hold much truth. She’d been irritated the entire day. From the moment William dared to broach the topic of her returning home, to the fact that he continued to have gowns made for her despite his words, Elizabeth could not find a moment’s rest. To garnish it all, she’d decided to speak her mind over dinner, telling him how unfair of him it was to play with her emotions in such a manner—whether he knew it or not—and she did not even get the chance.
He will surely hear me speak in the morning, she thought, stalking towards the door. I’ll make sure to give him a piece of my mind without leaving out a single thing!
Elizabeth was very aware that she was working herself into a frenzy, bolstering her anger for no reason. But anger was better than sadness, than crying. Like a lost party toy, she wished to cling to the feeling, to bring herself back. Even if she felt a little insane as she marched down the hallways, her nightgown fluttering around her ankles, Elizabeth felt more like herself than she had in years.
A stroll through the gardens should do me some good. Perhaps it shall clear my mind some. I have a feeling I will not be seeing William again until daylight so it will not make sense to—
Her thoughts came to jarring halt when she reached the top of the grand staircase and spotted William by the front door talking to Harold. She watched him shed his coat, saw him wince when he did, caught sight of the purple bruise stretching across his hard jaw. Every sliver of anger slipped away at the sight, leaving nothing but horror.
She didn’t say anything, couldn’t find the strength to speak. Her shock held her in place, even as her hand began to shake, as William said something to Harold and then happened to see her standing at the top of the staircase. His face grew grim and he murmured something else to the butler before Harold bowed and turned away, not looking in Elizabeth’s direction.
Slowly, she began to descend. She kept a hand on the bannister, the cool wood beneath her fingertips an odd comfort to the waves of dread she was suddenly trying to fight. William didn’t move from where he stood. But his gaze held hers, growing darker with every step she made.
Finally, she came to stand before him, her chest tightening. Finding her words felt impossible in that moment. Elizabeth opened her lips, but nothing came out.
“There is no need for me to fetch the physician,” he said. Though his voice was soft, it seemed to explode all around her, breaking her out of her trance. “It is not as serious as it appears.”
Elizabeth opened her lips again, intending to ask what happened to him. That, at least, she needed to know. But the words still wouldn’t come.
