I’m only saying this so that he’ll agree to the annulment, but it’s all true. I’m telling the truth by lying.
Why hadn’t she realized this earlier? Why hadn’t she insisted on it from the beginning? Maybe things would have been different if she had been honest with him sooner.
But she hadn’t known what was truly in her heart until this moment.
“You’re crying,” he noted, his voice hollow.
He blinked, then took a kerchief out of his waistcoat pocket and handed it to her.
“I care about you very much,” she croaked. Even though she knew it was dangerous to say, she couldn’t help it. “And I would have liked to have a real marriage and a family with you. But I realize now that it isn’t possible. Even if you said you changed your mind today, I wouldn’t have believed you. What would stop you from changing your mind again in a few days? Or months? Or even years? And by then, it would be too late for me to get an annulment.”
James’s expression had become stoney. And even as the words left her lips, all she wanted was for him to ignore everything she was saying, to leap across the desk and tell her,No, you are my wife, and we will work this out! I will be a real husband to you, and we will have many children!
But the look on his face told her everything she needed to know: he was not going to fight for her because he knew she was right.
He didn’t want a real relationship.
He didn’t want children.
He didn’t love her or want to make their marriage work.
And he didn’t trust himself not to change his mind again and devastate her.
“You have to let me go while there is still a possibility that I’ll find what I want,” she said, and the words hurt like a physical blow.
What will he think when he finds out I’m married to Redfield in a few weeks? Will he think I chose Redfield over him? Or will he suspect my father was behind it?
“It sounds as if you have made up your mind,” he uttered coldly. His whole body was rigid, and there a vein in his temple was throbbing.
“Yes,” she whispered.
No!her brain and body screamed.
“Then there is nothing that I can do to dissuade you,” he said. It wasn’t a question.
“No,” she murmured, lowering her eyes.
Yes! Fight for me! Tell me you know my feelings couldn’t have changed this quickly! Tell me you suspect my father is behind this! Tell me we will figure a way out of this together!
He nodded. “Well then, I shall speak to my solicitor and have him draw up the papers for an annulment.”
Even though it was what she had asked for, and what she wanted, the words landed heavily.
“There is no need,” she murmured. Leaning forward, she opened the briefcase and pulled out the annulment papers her father had given to her earlier. “I took the liberty of consulting a solicitor today.”
“Are you serious?” For the first time that day, James glared at her. “I have spent all day thinking of giving our marriage a chance, and you went to a solicitor?”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, “but I had to act. I cannot continue to live this way.”
“How did you even know where to find a solicitor?”
“I asked my mother. She has engaged in enough legal warfare with my father to know many things.”
“And that’s the other thing!” James snapped. “Your father! The whole reason you wanted this marriage was so that you could be safe from him. And now you’re going to annul our marriage and be at his mercy? I can’t allow that, Violet. Where will you go then? Who will protect you?”
“I have already thought of that,” she said at once. “Iris has written to me, and she and the Duke of Eavestone are arriving home tonight. I will go and stay with them.”
It was a lie, and James would surely find out very quickly, but it would buy her enough time to marry Lord Redfield and neutralize her father’s threat.
