“I wish you could trust me as I trust you. But I understand why you don’t.” Then, he unlaced the ties and delicately pulledthe shirt free from my wrists. He brought one of my hands to his mouth, his lips kissing a line from the underside of my wrist up to my elbow.
I gasped, and he continued going, the delicate skin trailing goose bumps as he reached my shoulder, then my neck. I threw back my head, letting him take the lead, letting him set the pace.
He reached down, carefully picking at the laces of my pants, getting his thumbs inside the waistband and drawing a circle with the edge of his finger.
I moaned and felt his grin where he continued the fine line between tickling and pleasure as he worked my throat. I shivered, putting one hand on his shoulder, the other finally getting into his thick hair. The silken strands grounded me as he managed to undo me with a single finger and his mouth.
Suddenly, he rolled us, pushing me down onto the bed. For a moment, my heart sped with the opposite of pleasure as I prepared myself for—I didn’t even get a chance to finish the thought because he pulled back, pushing his pants down and then looking at me in question.
“Do you want to do this?” he asked. “We don’t have to.”
His cock was thick and heavy, protruding between his thighs, and it had been too impossibly long since my own cock had been familiar with anything other than my hand.
I didn’t trust him. Ididn’t. But something else was blooming between us. I could have killed him in the caves. But he could have let his generals convince him I was behind the assassination attempt. So what did that mean for both of us?
I pulled back, then lifted my hips, desperately shoving my hands in the loosened fabric and pushing it down until my own cock popped free.
“We don’thaveto.” I grinned up at him, a bubble of laughter forming between us. “I’m sure there’s other things we’d both be more interested in right now. I hear you have interestingstrategy games here in the Imperium. Perhaps we could play one. Or do some embroidery. Maybe gild a manuscript.”
It was his turn to laugh, and then I shoved my pants all the way down, and he pulled them off my legs, stepping out of his own pants and undergarments while he worked. He prowled up the bed on hands and knees, a jungle cat approaching prey. His knees trapped mine, and I shoved upward, licking a palm and grabbing both of our cocks in one hand. When I tightened my grip, he groaned and began thrusting into the wet heat of my palm. Soon enough, the small lubrication of my saliva was gone, but precome wetted the way between us.
I shoved up, matching his thrusts, and he closed his eyes, frowning in concentration.No. I couldn’t do this withoutseeinghim.
“Tallu,” I said.
His eyes snapped open, finding mine, and I grinned in relief as he lowered his head, kissing me, teeth finding my bottom lip as he snapped his hips, the line between pleasure and pain fine enough that I spilled over.
He followed immediately, come dripping from between my fingers and over my wrist. I moaned, panting, and carefully loosened my hand.
He started to roll off me, but I tightened my arm around his back, and he settled, the weight reassuring. Maybe I couldn’t trust him.
Maybe a small part of me wondered if I would be able to kill him when it came down to it.
But right now, I was satisfied. Right now, I needed nothing.
Thirteen
Iwoke to an empty room. The light was barely trickling in, a soft white that turned yellow as soon as the sun crested the horizon. The massive door that guarded the emperor’s private chambers was open, and there was no sign of a struggle beyond what our lovemaking had done to the bedsheets.
Well. That was something. Somehow, I’d imagined that Tallu would want to wake with me, that he’d want more of what we’d shared. But perhaps Ishouldhave studied seduction with Eonaî and her private tutors. Maybe the rough, desperate act that Tallu and I had shared wasn’t enough to keep him in bed with me.
I refused to think about the way he’d said he didn’t deserve me, didn’t deserve what we’d shared. Clearly, he was a man who said more when he was desperate to find release than he meant when he was in his full senses.
And that was fair. That wasfine. I still had him. I still had his confidence and his trust, and I still could get him back in my bed anytime I was ready with a blade for his neck.
As soon as I sat up, putting my feet on the plush carpeting, someone stepped into the room, as though they’d been waiting for me just outside the open door. I flinched, hands tensing, but I didn’t have any weapons.
Before I could attack, I recognized him for what he was. One of the Emperor’s Dogs. His mask was carved the same as the others, but after seeing so many of them, I recognized that they moved just slightly differently, their heights a slight variation that told me that this wasn’t Sagam, the Dog I’d gotten to know.
He silently stepped to the side of the door, his hands clasped behind his back in a guard position. Both my eyebrows went up, and I exhaled a long breath, waiting for him to speak.
“So, are you here to inform the emperor when I wake?” I finally asked. My stomach turned over in hunger.
“No. Emperor Tallu has assigned me to guard your safety.” The man didn’t even move as he spoke. If it wasn’t just the two of us in the room, I might have believed that someone else was speaking for him.
“Assignedyouto guardmysafety?” I said slowly. “Since when do any of the emperor’s consorts receive the benefit of an Emperor’s Dog at their beck and call?”
“I am not at yourbeck and call. I am here to do my duty for the emperor.”
