‘That sounds like the perfect plan.’ Lily hugged her. ‘I’m so pleased for you.’
‘Me too. These few days away have been amazing for me.’ Aaliyah pulled backwards to fix Lily with the look Lily was pretty sure she used for her kids when they were being naughty. ‘Maybe this holiday will have an effect on you too. You need to start making a fuss about yourself. And take help from other people. You don’t always have to be the one who supports everyone else.’
‘Okay,’ said Lily, not because she meant it but because she wanted Aaliyah to stop looking at her like that.
‘Good. Right. Let’s find where we’re sitting.’
They were on the same table as each other, with Meg too, although it looked like she was going to be spending most of the evening in the kitchen, ‘helping’ Pythagoras. Lily wasn’t convinced Meg would actually know how to switch her own oven on at home, let alone help anyone produce restaurant-standard catering in a strange kitchen, but Pythagoras seemed very happy to have her company.
The rest of the people on the table seemed to be cousins of Tess’s. Including Matt.
Lily gave an involuntary start when she saw his name at the placenext to hers– not sure whether she was pleased or nervous and basically full of dread at the thought of sitting next to him for an entire meal – and then caught Aaliyah watching her and nodding.
‘What?’ she said. The know-it-all nodding was really annoying.
‘You’ve done such a good job of pretending that nothing ever hurts you that people actually believe it,’ Aaliyah said, indicating with her head towards Matt, who was walking towards them. ‘Even in bridezilla-mode, Tess wouldn’t have had you sitting next to Matt if she’d thought you minded. She genuinely thinks you’re over him.’
‘Shh,’ Lily hissed. What if heheard? Or ifanyoneheard? ‘And I’mfine. Thank you.’ Of course she was fine. Totally over him. It had been eight years. It was just a bit awkward, that was all. Anyone in her position would find it awkward.
Aaliyah smiled at her, mouthed, ‘Love you,’ and sat herself down at her place on the other side of the table. Well, at least Aaliyah was looking a lot happier now.
Lily sat down too.
Another cousin of Tess and Matt’s, Marie, and her husband, Ricky, were sitting on Lily’s other side. It was going to be tempting to turn her back on Matt and just talk to them. But she didn’t want to look like she was purposely ignoring Matt, especially with Aaliyah sitting right opposite anddefinitelyglancing over from time to time to check. Also, she actually did want to know what he’d been up to, check that he was happy. Ideally not with another woman, though. And where had that thought come from? She’d really loved him and she absolutelydidwant him to be happy and he was someone whoshouldbe in a relationship, so she should absolutely want that for him. God, it had hurt, though, when Tess had told her about Gemma.
Okay, so she was going to chat to him, in a very casual, nothing-to-see-here manner, find out what he’d been up to, be charming and make him think that he shouldnothave moved on from her so easily, no, not really,yes, really, and then talk to other people andmove back on with her life.
She turned to speak to him and… he was deep in conversation with the person on his other side, his older sister.
Right. Fine. Good, actually.
Marie and Ricky were lovely and – only straining over her shoulder to hear snippets of Matt’s conversation about half the time – she was happily mid-chat with them about Ricky’s bizarre (in Marie’s eyes) obsession with matching the colour of his socks to his mood, when Meg put a big, steaming casserole dish down in the centre of their table, and told everyone to dig in.
‘I helped make this,’ she said, ‘and it’s amazing.’ She looked at Lily and Aaliyah, who both had their eyebrows raised. Meg wasnota good cook. ‘Okay, I stirred it,’ she said, ‘when Pythagoras was busy. And I tasted it just now.’
Lily looked up and saw Matt smiling at them all, and had a sudden flashback to when they used to go out with each other’s friends. They’d all got on so well.
And that was all a very long time ago.
He was smiling at just her now and suddenly it felt like it was only the two of them here. There was definite babble going on around them, but she didn’t have the brain space to make out any of the words; she was too busy staring, gazing, into Matt’s eyes. Almost drowning in them. And now memories were jostling in her head, times when they’d sat together over dinners gazing at each other like this, the two of them a little unit, the rest of the world a distant backdrop.
She shook her head. She didn’t need to do this, revisit the past. She looked around her. Everyone else had served themselves. She reached out for the ladle propped up against the side of the casserole dish and said, ‘Pass your plate and I’ll serve,’ to Matt.
‘Sure. Thank you. What is it? I missed what Meg said.’
Lily tried really hard not to look smug that Matt had also clearly not been concentrating on anyone except her just then. If she was going to be pathetic, she’d rather not be pathetic alone.
‘I didn’t hear either,’ she said. ‘I’m sure it’ll be delicious though. We ate at Pythagoras’s restaurant the other evening and the food was amazing.’
‘Remember that time at that wedding in France,’ Matt said as Lily heaped spoonfuls of rice and then a gorgeously fragrant stew of some kind onto his plate. ‘The innards.’
‘Oh my God, yes. So disgusting.’ She’d said yes please to a large plate of unidentified food and had nearly gagged on the first mouthful and had had to eat the whole lot under the eagle eye of the bride’s grandmother. ‘And remember you with the pig’s ear.’ They’d gone to a traditional New Year’s dinner cooked by a Mongolian colleague of Lily’s and all the food had been wonderful except for the very hairy and chewy pig’s ear that Matt had struggled visibly with for minutes.
‘Yeah.’ Matt took a mouthful from his plate. ‘This is the exact opposite fortunately. Genuinely melt in the mouth.’
‘Mmm.’ Lily tasted her own first mouthful. ‘Yep. Gorgeous.’
Sitting next to Matt for dinner was way better than she’d have predicted. Maybe it was the amazing surroundings. She couldtotallysee why Carole and Norm had decided to move out here. And Penelope.
