“What brings you out from the key card protection of management?” Tyler asked.
Belen highlighted the beverage in her hand. “Hunger. I forgot my lunch at home.”
“Do you want to sit?” I asked, pushing away Tyler’s tray.
“I don’t want to impose.”
“Nah, it’s cool. Tyler was just leaving.”
Tyler shook his head in surprise. “I was?”
“Yeah, you have to assist with the kids in the parking lot.” I flashed him a look, hoping he’d catch the hint.
With a defeated hoist of his shoulders, Tyler stood. “I guess my lunch break is over. See you two later. Kris, remember what I said.”
“Yep mascot, got it.”
Belen sat with a smoothie in hand. “What was that about?”
“Oh he was just reminding me of my place in the food chain.”
“I’ve always found it best to ignore sixty-eight percent of what Tyler says.”
“Good rule of thumb.”
“Not going to lie, it’s kind of weird seeing Santa eat mall sushi at the food court.”
“Santa’s gotta eat too. How do you think I stay so jolly?” I wriggled my eyebrows.
“I thought you were jolly because you loved bringing happiness to millions of children across the world.”
“Nope, it’s food and Mrs. Claus’s fat ass.” My expression remained even but internally I was cringing at my crude joke. Yes, this was a seasonal gig, but there was still universal office etiquette that needed to be followed. Talking about asses, even fictitious ones, was definitely an HR no no.
Belen threw a curious look in my direction. “So what does Mrs. Claus think about you working as a mall Santa?”
I did my best to suppress a grin. Women who were out of my league didn’t ask probing questions like that. “Uh … there’s no Mrs. Claus. Past or present.”Was that a smile she was attempting to prevent from curving her lips?“What about yourself?”
“No, there’s no Mr. or Mrs. Claus in my life.”
“That’s good.” I bit the inside of my cheek.
“Is it?”
“Yeah, dating can be a distraction. And most relationships end, making the investment a complete waste of time.” This was not the way you convinced a woman to go out with you by warning her that you would most likely be a time suck with no tangible value.
“That’s a glass half empty take if I’ve ever heard one.”
“Even I have to admit that was a little dark.”
“Huge red flag. You probably shouldn’t lead with that next time.”
“Next time with who?”
“Any woman … human, really. Love is a waste of time, is a horrible pickup line.”
“Noted. Hopefully I’ll get a do over?”
Belen’s body posture perked up.
