“His name is Dylan, but everyone calls him Chap. He was a fixture in the young Hollywood club circuit. His dad’s a big-time music producer and his stepmother is Bille Preston.”
“Wow, legend.”
“Yeah, she really is. We started dating casually at first and then I was always at his place, or he was at mine. At the time Whiskey Wild was still struggling to make a name for ourselves. Anyway, Chap had all these great ideas and connections and before long he became our manager and my boyfriend.”
“Business and pleasure often get messy.”
“Yeah, that’s the thing, I didn’t think so at the time. I should have, but I wasn’t really thinking with my head.”
“What were you using your kit kat instead?”
“No, I was thinking with my heart …” We stared at each other in momentary silence. “And maybe my kitty just a little bit.”
“It happens to the best of us.”
“When’s the last time you led with your dick?”
“I plead the fifth.”
“We will be circling back to that. Anyway, Chap and I have been together for several years. And four days ago, I found out he was cheating. Like I walked in during the act.”
“Ouch, I’m sorry.”
“The thing is, after the initial shock, all I kept thinking is maybe it’s for the best.”
“Why do you think that?”
“Chap and I are two very different people, and I was kind of all wrapped up in him. Have you ever done that? You meet someone and then you slowly start to lose yourself. Their likes become your likes, so instead of hot dogs on a stick, you’re asking for tuna tartare.”
“What’s tuna tartare? Is that the raw stuff?”
“Yes, it’s the raw stuff. And it’s disgusting.” I tossed my arm in the air. “I just think I was starting to lose sense of who I was. And I needed to come home to try and figure out what was real and my next steps.”
“And you don’t think your next move includes Chap?”
“Have you heard that saying the thought of being with someone is often better than the reality of being with that person?”
“Yeah.”
“That’s what I think this is. With Dylan. Listen, I’m hurt by his cheating. I’m not gonna pretend I haven’t cried an ocean of tears, but maybe that asshole did me a favor.”
“You have to know any man who would cheat on you is an idiot, right?”
“I know. You might be surprised to hear this, but in LA I feel like a fish outta water. Every day, just struggling to breathe. And Dylan gave me legitimacy.”
“Why do you feel out of place?”
“I’m just waiting for people to figure out I’m a fraud and I don’t know what I’m doing and I never have.”
“You’ve written, what, five number one records?”
“Seven.”
“Seven number one records, gold and platinum albums. Sold-out concerts and headlining tours. That sounds real official to me.”
“Well Dylan doesn’t think so.”
“I thought we already established Dylan is missing a few brain cells. What he thinks doesn’t matter.”
