“He asked for some money. I told him I’d have to check with you, which he didn’t like.”
“How much?”
“Ten thousand dollars.”
“Doesn’t he get his monthly five-grand payment in a few days?”
“Yeah, I mentioned that to him and he started ranting about being an entrepreneur and needing to invest in some amazing opportunity. I don’t understand how he goes through it so fast.”
“Because he has a gambling addiction, and he likes sex workers. That shit ain’t cheap.” My father was on an allowance. He received five thousand dollars a month. But that never seemed to be enough. In the past I would bend and give him an extra two grand or a quick five hundred dollars. But I was just feeding the beast. He was lucky to get the five each month. Because if it wasn’t for my mom, he wouldn’t see a dime from me. As a grown ass man, you’d think he’d feel a way about his son supporting him. The funny thing is he clearly resented me for the financial assistance while steadily begging for funds.
“Do you want me to?—”
“No, if he wants more money, he can call me and ask for it.” He would more likely scoop out his eyeballs with a rusty spoon before making that request. That’s why he had Nori’s number on speed dial. On this I was setting boundaries. Danessa was partially right, I was at risk of spreading myself thin by trying to support the village. I needed to start cutting some of these motherfuckers off. Aside from the sperm, my father hadn’t done shit for me. “Maybe you should block his number. Nip this shit right in the bud.”
“Is that what you want?”
“Yeah. I don’t pay you enough to deal with my dad.”
“Okay, what’s on the agenda for the rest of your day?”
“I’m going to NA in an hour.”
“You seem to really like this new group.”
“Yeah, it’s because of Pete, the facilitator. He gives it to you real, no fluff. I appreciate that.”
“Good, I’m glad you found a group you like the first time out. I’m proud of you.”
“For what? Not killing myself?”
Nori reached for my hand which let me know she was serious. “It was scary for a while and I’m just happy you’re in a better place. You deserve all you’ve earned. I know youfeel guilty, but you worked hard for each and every blessing. And more importantly you keep putting in the work for your sobriety.”
“I’m sorry you had to see me like that.” Nori witnessed the worst of me. At the height of my addiction, I was abusive and mean. She should’ve quit over a dozen times, but she didn’t give up on me. And for that she would forever have my love and respect.
“I’ve always got your back, Goofy.” She called me that because she claimed I walked like Goofy the cartoon character. Which I didn’t by the way. “Can I ask?”
“Hmm?”
“Have you told Danessa?”
“That I’m a drug addict? No, nope I could never find a way to weave it into the conversation.”
“But you’re going to tell her, right?”
“Eventually. We just went on a first date. There’s a ton of catching up we have to do.”
“Just promise you’ll tell her before shit gets too deep.”
I nod in agreement. We were already in too deep.
After a close game at home,the Ramblers were on a mini-winning streak. I couldn’t leave the arena fast enough, heading straight to Danessa’s place. You know that feeling when you meet someone new, and you want to spend every waking moment with them? That was me right now. When I was at work or the gym, all I could think about was her. And when I was with her, I wished each day was daylight savings so I could have more time in her presence.
Normally, I preferred to play it cool. No declarations of love before the six-month mark. We could discuss the possibility of meeting my mother after a year. It was a pass on matching tattoos or names inked onto my skin. Oddly enough I got Danessa’s name tattooed on my chest in college. Something I wouldn’t do for any other woman. After we broke up, I’d considered covering it up dozens of times but doing that felt like I was admitting we were a mistake, and it was never that.
From the hall I could detect the sound of footsteps getting closer. When she opened the door her eyes lit up, but then she immediately caught herself as if she didn’t want me to know how happy she was to see me. “Hello.” Her tone was casual.
“Don’t play with me. Acting all formal like I wasn’t balls deep in your shit less than twenty-four hours ago.”
