“The fridge is right behind you.”
Aldridge reached for the handle opening the refrigerator door. “It’s big.”
“Sub zero. It’s considered an entertainer’s kitchen.”
“Okay,” he scoffed.
“You’re new to town you might make new friends. Or maybe your girlfriend likes to entertain.”
His head swiveled in my direction. “My who?”
“Your girlfriend, Amber … Alison … Alica?” I pretended like I hadn’t spent hours Googling him.
“Ashley.”
“Yeah I think that’s it.”
Aldridge flashed me a look that told me he wasn’t walking into my hastily crafted trap before entering the living room. “I hate the way this place is decorated.”Please note my question regarding a significant other was deflected.
“You’re not buying the furniture.”
“What is it about rich people and taste? It’s like the richer you get the shittier your sense of style becomes. Gold toilets, imitation Roman sculptures, and those ugly colosseum columns. It’s a home, not Caesar’s Palace for God’s sake.”
“You said you wanted something with character.”
“Yes, elegant, refined, not cartoonish.”
“The toilets can be changed and the column is not part of Bovine’s original design.”
“It feels like we stepped into a time machine. Is that why his properties are so popular because once you cross the threshold you are back in the seventies?”
“It’s not that bad.”
“The living room is sunken.”
“Okay tell me what you do like about the place?”
Aldridge looked around trying to come up with something nice to say. “I like that the sliding glass door slides all the way out of view. It makes the area feel open and extends the living space.”
“And the cons?”
“I bet if we did our research we could locate a porn movie from back in the day with this house featured in it. A housewife gets a knock at the door and it’s the horny repairman with tight pants and a handlebar mustache.”
“Wildly specific.” I laughed.
“And he’d say, ‘What seems to be the problem?’”
Aldridge looked to me like he was waiting for me to deliver the next line. I decided to play along. “My washer is on the fritz.”
“I have the tool that can fix that.”
“I bet you have a lot of useful tools.” My cheeks heated up at this silly game.
Aldridge took several steps in my direction, causing the heat to morph into a steady burn. “Sweet cheeks, you have no idea.” His eyes were smoldering.Was he still playing around?“And then the cheesy music would start up and the washing machine wouldn’t be the only thing getting a tune up.” Aldridge’s face was normal and he appeared completely unbothered.
I, on the other hand was able to identify a distinct throb in my pleasure center. “Why was the music so corny?” I turned on my heels and walked out of his eyesight.
“Should we head upstairs?”
