“I feel you, but at some point paying two mortgages becomes silly.”
“We’ll discuss that when the time comes.”
“You should know by now I can’t get enough of you.”
“Well let’s see how you feel in a few months.”
“Months, years, decades, my answer will always be the same. I love you, Nessa and we have a lot of time to make up for.”
She cupped my cheek, her fingers fondling my ears. “I love you too. And this year is all about new beginnings. New house, new semester, new season.”
“New beginnings I like that.” Moving to Vegas came with the unexpected. I certainly didn’t anticipate finding love and for it to be with the woman I couldn’t stop thinking about. I’d built new friendships and lost some old ties. Lamonte and I still weren’t talking. My mother and I were coolish, no matter what or how many times she took up for him, I’d still always have her back. One of the things I’d learned was if you’re not willing to walk away, then you have to meet people where they are.
Vegas also provided new clarity about my sobriety. Change can cause people to stumble and relapse. But I’d pushed through with weekly NA meetings and the support of my friends. I was proud to say I’d now been sober for almost two and a half years, and I didn’t take that accomplishment lightly because I fought for this every day. There was so much to look forward to, thestart of a new season, the chance to defend our crown, and my future with this fine woman wrapped in my arms.
Heartbreak taught me there’s always love to be had. It might not always be romantic love. It could be love of self, or passion in a hobby, perhaps deep friendships that enrich you and build you up. A broken heart shouldn’t stop you from loving and eventually when you’re ready, you just might find your soulmate. And if you’re really lucky, like me, it will be your first love, the woman who taught you this kind of love was even possible.
Danessa was that for me. My first love, my last love, my forever love.
