“Danessa wait,” I called after her, shooting the disastrous duo an angry look.
I caught up with Danessa almost halfway down the block. “Hey, can you slow down?”
“I’m done with her. Everything is an opportunity to embarrass me or make me uncomfortable.” Danessa shifted her weight from side to side as if she couldn’t contain the hostile energy flowing through her body.
“You were ambushed too.”
“I explicitly told her not to play matchmaker when it came to you and me, and she did the complete opposite.”
“I should have known Dante and Anika would find a way to turn this into a shit show.”
“Do you know she actually thinks you’re still in love with me?”
My half strangled laughter rang out. “That’s crazy.” Why would I still be in love with my ex who I haven’t seen or thought about in over five years? It’s not like I was secretly stalking her social media pages and practically had an aneurysm when she was briefly engaged. No, no I was definitely not in love.
“It’s delusional. Some fairytale about second chances and fate.” She rolled her eyes and waved her hands like the thought of a do-over was nonsensical. I was all for redos, reheating leftovers, replaying songs, retracing my steps, reporting for duty. Okay that last one didn’t make sense, but you get my drift.
Danessa didn’t get mad often so when she was angry, you knew you’d fucked up. And Anika clearly fucked up because the thought of being on a date with me was so unsettling, Danessa was shaking with rage.
“Dante is just as bad. He claimed he was setting me up with one of his homegirls. Now I’m over here looking stupid for believing him because I don’t think he has any friends who are female. I’m pretty sure this plan was to hook us up all along. Why Dante is so invested in this little charade, I’ll never understand.”
“Because he’s balls deep in my sister and he’d probably wrestle an alligator if she asked him.”
“Okay, I didn’t need that visual.”
“Wrestling an alligator?”
“No, the disturbing graphic balls deep visuals.”
“When did you turn into a pussy?”
I clutched my chest. “Wow, ma’am it’s nine o’clock. I don’t feel comfortable talking about ball sacks and pussy until well after midnight.”
“So demure.”
“I’m a gentleman and I expect to be treated as such,” I joked.
“A delicate six-foot-five flower.”
“I’m in my soft guy era.” I kept my composure for as long as I could before cracking up and Danessa followed suit. Laughing with her was my favorite pastime. She had two laughs, her soft dainty chuckle and then her maniacal Joker on steroids life. That was the laugh I loved the most. It was like she was an evil genius who’d just hatched her next plan for world domination.
Danessa unfolded her body as the remaining laughter waned. “I wasn’t even interested in going on a date, but you know Anika, she guilted me until I agreed.”
“Yeah, I was apprehensive too. But everyone’s been telling me you’re not going to make friends locked in your hotel room. And it’s hard to disagree with them.”
“I’m sorry. You probably thought you’d been hooked up with a baddie and then you saw me.”
“I was surprised, yes, but don’t act like you don’t clear the baddie category.”
Now that her frustration was dissipating, I was briefly treated to an appreciative smile. “You know what? I blame myself because what the fuck was I thinking trusting my sister.”
I checked my watch. “Do you want me to walk you to your car?”
“No, I’m not trying to ruin your night any further.”
“For the record my night wasn’t ruined because you’re here.”
“Yeah right, I’m sure you had high hopes for a very different ending to this evening.”
