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“There is nothing to work out. ” She glared back at him.
“Isn’t there?” he asked, taking the chair beside the couch and staring back at her intently. “You don’t trust me, Jaci, or you would have told me what I needed to know about Roberts. ”
Her lips twisted mockingly. “So it has to come down to what you want, versus my privacy? If you’d done your job right you’d know I don’t carry tales, Cam. So, why don’t we discuss you for a while? Do you slight every woman you fuck the way you slighted me last night, or am I just an anomaly?”
“If I’d done my job right, I would have managed to identify any old lovers as well,” he stated. “But those didn’t turn up, either. And I didn’t slight you. ”
It would be damned hard to identify a vibrator. She kept her lips firmly closed, her gaze locked with his. Would he be shocked to know she had never had sex with a man or a woman? Had that little issue of trust, and the awareness of how easily she could feel betrayed, reared its ugly head too often?
He nodded slowly. “We’ll do it your way for now, but my time will come. ”
Why that statement sent a jagged pulse of heat racing through her, she wasn’t certain.
“You’ve changed,” she finally said. “You’re harder, Cam. Colder. ”
“I’m still the man who would kill for you,” he stated matter-offactly.
Jaci swallowed tightly. He was completely serious.
“Fine. I’ll make a list for you. ” She finally shrugged, opting not to believe that declaration. “Give me a few days. It may take awhile to remember every son of a bitch who ever pissed me off. But what will you do when you find your name on the list?”
She should have felt stalked. Instead, she knew instinctively what he meant. Realizing how certain she was of that knowledge was almost frightening. Cam would protect her, and, in his way, he was assuring her of that. Even now, so many years after he had made the promise, he still stood by it. And she had no doubt he meant it.
“I won’t find my name on that list. ” His lips quirked in a cool smile. “And I’m afraid if I did, I’d have to ignore it. I would do nothing to hurt you, Jaci. You know that. I might paddle your behind for being so stubborn, but I wouldn’t hurt you. ”
“Is this a new seduction technique? You keep threatening to hit me Cam, and I’m going to get worried. ”
He snorted at that before leaning forward, his elbows resting on his knees while he clasped his hands.
“We need to talk about this thing between us. ” His gaze was intent, somber.
“No we don’t. ” She was perfectly content to just stay furious with him for a little while longer. “Unless you’re going to explain why you couldn’t sleep with me. ”
He stared at her from between thick, lush black lashes, his tanned face seemingly wicked, with that scar running down it. As she stared at him, that ache inside her expanded, filled her chest, and then went deeper. What had happened to her dark knight that had scarred his body and made him unwilling to share something as simple as a bed with a woman?
That was such a small intimacy, really, in the total scheme of things. But as she watched him, she could feel a knowledge, a certainty that the Cam she knew was still there somewhere. And she wondered why in the hell she felt so compelled to reach out to him.
“What happened?” she finally whispered. “How were you hurt?”
She needed to know.
“Does the scar affect what’s between us?” he asked, watching her closely.
“There is no ‘us’,” she reminded him, ignoring the clenching of her heart. “You don’t sleep with me, you don’t do anything else with me. Period. ”
His lips quirked mockingly as his hand lifted, two fingers thoughtfully running down the scar. “My last mission in the service went bad,” he finally stated. “We were ambushed in Afghanistan and taken prisoner for a few days before we escaped. My chest is pretty messed up, too, as well as my back. It’s not a pretty sight. ”
Her breath caught. “You were hurt that bad?” Terror snaked through her.
“I nearly died. ” He shrugged as though it didn’t matter. “The doctors were frankly surprised that I survived. ”
She had almost lost him. She stared back at him, her breathing harsh, the certainty that he had nearly been taken out of this world slamming inside her.
“I’m fine, Jaci. ” He was watching her too closely, his eyes no longer icy, but thoughtful instead, as she reached for the wine, finished it, and then smacked the glass back to the table.
“You are now. ” She hadn’t known. She had been focused on her own life all those years, refusing to contact him, to even check on him. He was in the military and she had known it, the chance of danger in his particular field had been high. Why hadn’t it occurred to her that Cam could be hurt?
“I am now. ” He was still watching her with that quizzical expression of a male pondering a puzzle. “Why does it matter?”
