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Cam had kissed her forehead and told her good night. And then he had left her, moving from the bedroom back to the living room and the cold emptiness of the apartment.
Why? Why couldn’t he sleep with her?
She rolled over to her back and stared at the ceiling above her. She hadn’t expected this when she moved in with him, this sense of bonding, and still the aloneness. This was the second night he had taken her like a wild man, pushing her, pushing both of them, and leaving them shaking in the aftermath.
And it was the second time he had left her to face the night alone.
Well, too damned bad, because she had faced too many nights alone. Too many nights when she had needed him close to her and refused to allow herself other options. Too many nights when she had wondered what she had allowed to slip from her fingers. So, the fight was going to be harder than she had imagined it would be. She would just have to adapt.
She rose again from the bed, padded to the living area, and stared at Cam as he lay unmoving, silent and awake, on the large sectional couch.
The short curve of the cushioned furniture was empty, so she curled up there, her feet tucking against his as she drew another of the thin throws from the back of the couch and pulled it around her.
His legs parted enough to trap her feet farther within the warmth of them, then the television winked out.
Silence stretched between them, but it was a warm silence, one that felt comfortable, that wrapped around her and sent a surge of relief rocking her.
“Good night, Cam,” she whispered.
“Good night, baby. ”
She turned on her side, tucked her back closer to the couch, and closed her eyes. Within minutes, sleep overcame her as it hadn’t in that too-big, too-cold bed.
Cam knew the moment she fell asleep and lay still and silent, waiting for the sense of smothering unease to fill him. He hadn’t slept with a woman since he was in his teens, since he was forced to stay in those old bitches’ beds until the sun rose. He had rarely slept, certainly, other than once, he had barely dozed. His skin had crawled with the feel of their naked bodies plastered against his back, their hands groping at him, even in their sleep.
Rather than the need to get up and find another place to sleep, a place alone, Cam found, instead, an uncertain peace. Jaci’s feet were tucked against his lower legs, fragile, soft, and warm. He could see her face from where he lay, her expression serene now, as it hadn’t been when he’d checked on her the night before.
She was comfortable and warm, and close to him.
His lips quirked at the thought of that, and at the fragile enjoyment he was finding in her feet shifting, pressing closer to him.
They had been cold when she first lay down and curled herself on the curved section of the couch. The chill had quickly turned to warmth though, and as she fell asleep, her graceful little toes had curled as though in contentment, before relaxing once again.
And now, rather than wondering how long he’d have to lie there before he could leave her without hurting her, he found drowsiness drifting over him instead.
He hadn’t slept worth shit the night before, and he’d feared tonight would be no better. Now he smothered a yawn, let his eyes close, and found himself drifting to sleep with a speed and contentment that he hadn’t known since he was a child.
Jaci muttered in her sleep as he felt himself drifting off, and he smiled at the sound. He could get used to that, he thought. He could get very used to it.
20
“I think it’s singularly unfair that you’re being given freedom to roam the club, while I have to beg for months just for a drink at the bar,” Courtney pouted several days later, as she trailed Jaci through the club.
Jaci snapped another picture with the digital camera she used, before turning to look over her shoulder at her friend.
Courtney’s eyes were filled with amusement, though her expression was less than pleased.
“No doubt you cause as much trouble in here as you do anywhere else,” Jaci accused her. “Where’s the fascination in it?” She let the camera hang by its strap below her breasts, as she made a few notes on the electronic notepad she carried with her.
“Tell me you see the possibilities, Jaci. ” Courtney’s voice was scandalized. “It is an adventure. ”
“It’s a place full of men,” Jaci said as she lifted the camera and zoomed in on the molding at the ceiling. “The exercise room is sweaty and smelly. The library is dark and gloomy, and the living area has a bar and a billiards table. Give me a break. It’s so male-oriented, you nearly choke on the testosterone. ”
She could feel Courtney behind her, almost see the outraged expression on her friend’s face.
“And they do not want us here. ” There was a pout in Courtney’s voice. “They are determined to close us out of their little conversations and their conniving. It’s totally unfair. ”
“Hmm. Maybe we should invite them to the spa with us,” Jaci suggested. “See what they think about estrogen overload. ”
