Darcy laughed. “We are not such a political family.Service to the king, and to the country, but we have never looked to have a high place in parliament or to change the country. It is the land around — that is what Papa would say. The land is eternal, the land was here before there were Darcys, and it will be there after our name is forgotten. That is what matters. And that we fulfill our duty to those who live upon it.”
“Did he work hard like you?”
“Harder… he rather disliked himself when he did not have a task before him. He had few friends. He despised novels, he did not like ancient scholarship, though he tolerated how much I enjoyed Greek when I was in university. He read agricultural journals, and he made sure he knew about scientific advances in case any of them could be applied profitably to the estate — but otherwise, there was nothing he liked so much as planning out improvements, riding the land, even helping to dig the ditches for the drainage pipes — he kept that as secret as possible, lest it be known and damage his dignity.”
“Very much like you, and yet very different at the same time.”
“I wonder what our child will be like? — Mr. Wickham was in truth the man who knew him best — I mean the old steward. But Wickham, the present Mr. Wickham, I only ever saw my father smile and forget himself with him.”
“Never with you?”
“No. I — it is a matter I still cannot decide in my heart. Did that mean that he loved Wickham more? Or did he love me too much to lose an opportunity to train me to be the heir he wished? He was satisfied with me. He told me he was proud of me. On the day he died. Those were nearly his last words, except he then asked when Wickham would arrive. And then he died before Wickham did.”
“You wish there had been more affection.”
“Discipline and duty are important. The heir must be ofsufficient quality.”
Elizabeth walked on with him. She thought about her own father. His failings, and his strengths, and the way that while she could forgive him, she could not forget how he had hurt and disappointed her. They crossed a bridge over the stream again, and on the far side she bent to pick up some snow and shape it into a ball.
“I promise, if you throw that at me, I will throw one back,” Darcy said, his eyes twinkling.
“Then I shall wait,” Elizabeth replied grinning, “until we walk out with Georgiana, I believe I can rely upon her to make the odds even.”
So saying she tossed it against a tree.
“Two of you against me?”
“You are very tall.”
Darcy thought about that for a moment. “That is not fair, it only makes me a bigger target.”
Elizabeth laughed. She was delighted when he joked.
“No truly,” he insisted.
“I would never wish for my child… forourchild to not… always know that they are loved,” Elizabeth said passionately. “You are a man with a deep ability to be kind and affectionate. I thought for a long time that you could not smile. Or that you hardly did. That you had little sense of humor, that you were cold and filled with a sense of your own pride and importance. I understand how you find it difficult to be sweet and easy with most people, but you must promise me that you will make certain that our child, especially if we should have a son, sees this part of your nature, sees the ways that you can be kind and sweet.”
He nodded. “Pride is important, but I wish there to be love as well. Always love.”
“And always an acceptance for human frailty—”
“Believe me,” Darcy said dryly, “I have learned that I must acceptthat.”
“My father seldom works, and the only reason he does not read many novels is because he finds history and science more amusing,” Elizabeth said. “A balance is best.”
“Perhaps the lack of a son to pass the estate on to discourages him from putting any great effort into its improvement,” Darcy replied. But something about the way he spoke showed clearly that he disapproved, nonetheless.
“Mama always has been so unhappy and nervous about if we would marry. It has been fifteen years since Lydia was born, and he sets nothing aside for our dowries.”
When Darcy did not reply, Elizabeth glanced at him.
He said, “You will have to tell me directly if you wish for me to either abuse your fatherorto defend him.”
Elizabeth laughed. “Yourway of thinking, both in your virtues and your defects is very different than his.”
“I do like him. He called on me in London, to encourage me to return. But his effort was wholly superfluous as I had already determined I would set off the next day… it was your letter, you know, that led me to come. It gave me hope, as I had not had before.”
Elizabeth flushed. “Oh no! I now must say something that might encourage you to like my father yet further. It washisletter tomethat encouraged me to writethatletter.”
