“I might prefer to ensure that there is sufficient money for any of my children to be well supplied in necessities,” Elizabeth replied.
“Don’t you owe your children,” Lady Susan said, “These children that do not yet exist, to give them a glowing example of what a woman can be? Do you not owe them beauty — more to the point, do you wish for them to act as though they are poor?”
“Yes,” Elizabeth replied flatly. “Everyone would benefit, in my view, if they behaved as though they were a little poorer than they actually are.”
She would not insult her father aloud with these relations by marriage, but she saw clearly now that he had done a terrible job of preparing them for the day that he would die.
He had rather been like Mrs. Harrington, shrugging at a horde of children who needed to somehow have honorable positions carved for themselves, and saying “Things will work out,” while the whole time Mama had been desperately at work to get them married so they would be well.
Not, not that Elizabeth was prepared to approve of her mother’s approach to the whole matter. Not in the slightest.
But at least shehadmade an effort.
Lady Matlock frowned at her. “The honor of a house, its dignity, it requires that all of the members behave in a particular way, dress in a particular way, and display themselves in a particular way. If we do not, if we let ourselves be seenwith fewer footmen, less lace on our dresses, and behaving in a miserly manner, if our husbands cannot afford their hunting horses, our fast carriages, and to play with high stakes at cards, we will lose the respect of those around us — and when we lose that, our position as a family, our ability to influence the course of policy in England, and our ability to look our dependents in the eye and demand their obedience will decline.”
“And why… what is the harm? So long as there is sufficient money, we can live as we will. Why should I carehowI am looked upon by the world in general? — Besides, I think it likely thatmostof the world has too much good sense, and is too busy to concern itself with whether I wear the same dress twice a week, or burn each dress in solemn ceremony after I remove it for the first time.”
Georgiana giggled when Elizabeth said that. She then offered, showing more bravery than she did when anyone outside of the family circle was present, “People wouldtalkif youburnedthe dress after wearing it only once.”
Lady Susan had a dreamy expression. “It would impress people greatly, if someone was known to do that.”
“No,” Lady Matlock said. “Not even we have the fortune to spend on that.”
“But wouldn’t it,” Elizabeth replied, “convince everyone that you have money enough to recklessly waste?”
“One must not be foolish about it, nor obvious, like a nabob returned from India with more fortune than almost any house that has served the king honorably for three hundred years,” Lady Matlock replied.
“You cannot convince me,” Elizabeth replied.
“You still think like a small person, like your uncle the tradesman, and you donotyet think the way that you ought as the wife of a man such as Mr. Darcy.”
“I rather,” Elizabeth replied, “prefer the way I think totaking it into my head to be uselessly fine, and to spending money without any end simply to prove that I can do so — and I have sworn to not spend more than fifty a year on my clothing.”
“Why did you do that?” Lady Susan said. “This is the second time you have said as much, so I am now convinced it is not merely some joke of yours, but where did you stumble upon such a ridiculous number.”
“It isnota ridiculous number,” Elizabeth replied.
“Oh, but it is, and it guarantees that you shall need to wear the same dress twice a week, and everyone will think Mr. Darcy hates you for that alone.”
“Not when they see how he looks at her,” Georgiana said, surprising all of them. “He loves her, that is clear for anyone to see.”
Elizabeth flushed.
She did not know if she believed Georgiana. But the words of her niece made Lady Matlock nod thoughtfully.
Lady Susan said, “No, no! You cannot. Eliza, I want to see you in all sorts of dresses — and you must wish to convince everyone that it is a love match.”
“I do not wish to convince anyone of anything.” Elizabeth replied sharply. She rose and bowed to the company. “My apologies, but I just recalled a matter I must deal with.”
That was barely a pretense of leaving the conversation for a real reason, but Elizabeth could not stay there. She was filled with a sudden tight emotion, and she was not sure if she wanted to rage, cry, or hunt down Darcy and kiss him.
Why had Georgiana said that?
DidMr. Darcy actually love her?
No, he only felt a strong lustful desire. If he’d loved her, truly loved her, so much of his behavior would have been different.
She stomped to the library, and Elizabeth paced in circlesand circles. Darcy was too difficult to think of, too confusing and tangled. So instead she thought about this endless poking, the demand that she wear clothes that were more expensive.
