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It was lust. Lust was a powerful force, she reminded herself. It couldn’t have anything to do with the need to just curl into his arms and rest there. That was weakness, not lust.
It was loneliness. She had separated herself from most friendships, she hadn’t allowed herself a lover because she couldn’t have the lover she wanted. So comfort wasn’t something she knew a lot about. But it was something she missed more often than not.
Running her hands down the sides of her skirt, Rogue pulled back from the window and drew in a deep, hard breath. She could almost feel him moving closer. Through the bar, his shoulders brushing against the women who would crowd closer, just to feel the heat and hardness of his corded, muscular body.
She closed her eyes, remembering the feel of him herself. The way his body seemed to wrap around her when he almost, just almost brushed against her. Zeke always made certain he didn’t actually touch her unless he had no choice.
The jarring ring of the phone had her eyes jerking open. Frowning, she pulled the cell phone from the clip at her side and flipped it open after checking the number.
“Yeah, Jonesy?”
“Sheriff wants to talk to you,” he growled. “You in?”
Her lips almost twitched at his protectiveness. “Yes, Jonesy. Send him on up. ”
Jonesy grunted and she could almost see the wrinkles in his brow as he frowned.
Flipping the phone closed, she laid it on the table by the couch and moved to the door.
She opened it, pulled it wide, and moved back to the kitchen for a bottle of water.
Something to do with herself as she waited. To calm herself, to settle her vulnerabilities until she could reestablish her shields.
Joe and Jaime’s deaths had thrown her. It had left her drifting, uncertain, questioning too many things in her life. The twins were two of the few people she had allowed herself to care for in the past years. She kept most people at a distance simply so they couldn’t hurt her, so they couldn’t be used against her to hurt her. It was easier that way. Easier on her heart and on her life.
Damn, she hadn’t realized how much she had let herself care about people until today.
“Leaving your door open like this could be dangerous. ” Zeke’s dark voice filled the room as she reached inside the fridge for the bottle of water.
She paused, closed her eyes, and took in a deep, hard breath before clenching the water and pulling back. She turned to face him, letting the fridge door close as her eyes met his.
They were eagle fierce in his sun-darkened face. His dark brown hair was cut short, almost military short. There was the lightest sprinkling of gray at his temples. It was sexy.
Those damned jeans molded to his thighs. The fabric of his shirt was just a little loose but did nothing to hide the power of his broad chest and shoulders. And yes, he was wearing boots. Scarred work boots. The kind that just made a man’s legs look strong and sturdy.
“I knew you were coming up. ” She shrugged. “Close the door behind you. ”
He stood there, staring at her.
“Unless you’re scared to be alone here with me. ” She moved slowly through the kitchen area to the living room. “Afraid your reputation will suffer, Sheriff?”
His lips quirked. Rogue watched as his arm reached out, his fingers gripped the doorknob, and he closed the door slowly. A second later, those lean fingers flipped the locks in place without his gaze ever leaving hers.
“So brave. ” She pretended to shiver. “You’re living dangerously this week. ”
He stared back at her the way he usually did unless she pushed him. As though he were on the edge of being bored with her. Damn him. She didn’t bore him. She made him hard. He was filling those damned jeans out in ways she knew they weren’t meant to be filled. That was not boredom.
“You heard about Joe and Jaime,” he stated as he moved farther into the room. “I tried to find time to come out and tell you myself, but I was tied up with forensics and city hall. ”
“Not a problem. ” She shrugged as she twisted the cap off the water. “I’m sure I heard about it before the coroner ever had the bodies loaded and ready to go. Your deputy likes to run his mouth, Sheriff. Seems he thinks trailer trash like the Walkers don’t warrant a forensics team. Bad blood showing and all that. Why should the city waste its money on two men that just got what they deserved. ”
His lips thinned. Anger perhaps. Irritation definitely as he strode to where she stood.
“Sit down, Rogue. I’ll deal with my deputy and city hall. Until then, I’d like to figure out what the hell happened with Joe and Jaime. ”
She sat down on the couch and would have laughed in mocking amusement when he took the chair beside her, except the disappointment went too deep. She would have felt his warmth if he had sat on the couch. And she felt cold inside. For some reason, she felt lost. As though she had traveled too far and too long from some vision of security and now found herself deep in unfamiliar territory.
“I’m sorry about Joe and Jaime, Rogue. ” Zeke sighed then, rubbing his hand over the back of his neck. “I know those boys were closer to you than most folks knew. That’s why I need to talk to you. See if you can help me figure out what happened. ”
