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Was he following her? She could feel him behind her, watching her. She felt like a rabbit beneath the regard of a hungry wolf.
She saw him as she turned up the steps. He was behind her. Far enough away that she could tell he was deliberately keeping distance between them.
“Is the investigation over?” she asked as she shoved the key into the door and stepped inside.
“It’s over. They rounded the final members up the night after Jonesy was killed. They have all the evidence they need to lock them up for a damned long time. ”
Rogue nodded. “From what I’ve been hearing they didn’t have much of a chance for success anyway. A bunch of crazy old men looking for a war. ”
“That about sums it up. ” His voice was clipped, cool as he stepped into the apartment behind her and closed the door. “But these crazy old coots were smarter than you’d think. And more dangerous. ”
She nodded. Yeah, she’d heard that, too. They’d killed a lot of good men and women and been responsible for even more deaths over the past thirty years.
“How’s Gene doing?” she asked.
Zeke blew out a hard breath. “It’s been hard on him. He didn’t even know Cammi was seeing the Walker boys. It shook him up, realizing she was hiding it from him. Makes sense why she ran off to her sisters after they were killed though. She was devastated. ”
“She loved them?” Rogue turned and stared at him from where she stood in the living room.
“She cared a hell of a lot anyway. ” He shook his head, his expression heavy. “She wasn’t aware anyone was looking for her. She thought Joe had killed Jaime and then himself, because of her. Gene’s taking care of her though. That’s the important part. ”
That was the important part, Rogue agreed. Like her father had tried to take care of her, and she had refused to allow it. Her family had gathered around her, giving advice, offering their support, and nothing helped the pain; no one could ease it.
She stared back at Zeke now and swallowed at the lump of pain in her throat. It had been so long since she had felt his arms around her. So many nights she had cried into her pillow, aching, hurting.
“Do you hate me, Rogue?” he asked then, standing before her, tall and so very arrogant, as though he were daring her to strike out at him. As though he expected it.
“Would you hate me?” she asked him.
She had wondered over the past week if she was right or wrong in how she felt. Should she punish him, or should she simply love him?
He grimaced heavily. “I’d paddle your damned ass if you pulled something like that on me,” he finally admitted. “But son of a bitch if I would let you go, Rogue. There wouldn’t have been a night that I wasn’t trying to get into your bed anyway. ”
“I can’t paddle your ass,” she said, her voice thickening with the emotion clogging it.
“What am I supposed to do, Zeke, wait until the next time you’re worried for me, scared I’ll be hurt, and you do it again? How do I know when you’re committed to me rather than your fears of losing someone?”
His jaw clenched furiously. “You sound like Shane now. He hasn’t spoken to me since he found out what had been going on the past ten years. He’s pouting in Louisville like a child because I didn’t tell him before he left on that trip what was going on. ”
“Because you could have died while he was gone,” she snapped. “Because he loves you, Zeke. How do you think it makes us feel? To know you’d push us away so damned easily?”
“That I’d protect you?” he growled back. “I’d hope you’d understand how important you are to me. God, Rogue, do you think I wanted to die knowing if I had told you how I felt that you would have grieved worse? Or if I was arrested and charged for a murder I committed as a child, do you think I wanted you to hold on to me when I didn’t have a future to give you?”
“And that’s acceptable?” she cried. “Fine, Zeke, let’s turn the table. Would you accept it?”
“Fuck no!” he yelled back. “You’re mine, damn you. No matter what. ”
“My God, listen to you. ” She was in his face, almost nose to nose, anger beating a ragged tattoo in her veins. “Listen to how arrogant you are! Why should I accept it?
Why shouldn’t you belong to me, too, Zeke? Do you think for one damned minute I’ll only take you when you’re safe? God, what is that, a weekend out of the fucking year?”
His eyes narrowed. “You’ll take me, period, every damned day of the year,” he snarled back. “Fine, I was a fucking fool. I was stupid. I was a dumb- fuck hick that loved his woman enough to want to protect her. So shoot me. ”
“Give me the gun. ” Hands on hips, arousal and anger firing in her blood, she yelled the words back at him.
It flooded her now. The long nights without him, the anger that he would stay away from her without telling her he loved her. That he would wait until she was angry, until she wanted to kick him, before admitting it.
“You little hellion. ” Amazement darkened his gaze and filled his face. “You stubborn little witch. You won’t even say you love me, will you?”
