“I don’t want to shift and play.” Her younger self sighed. “We’re too old for that now anyway.”
“Why?” He grinned and teased. “You’re never too old to play.”
“I agree.” Trinity released a dark, throaty chuckle she would never have issued before mating with Vicar. “In bed or out of it.”
“I’m just not in the mood,” young Raven grumbled. “I want to do something else. Things we’ve never been able to do.” She stopped and leaned against a stalagmite the best she could in her ethereal state. “You know what I mean.”
“I do.” Tor braced his hand against the rock beside her head and leaned in close. “And we will someday. I’m sure of it.” He cupped her cheek so tenderly you would have thought he actually touched her. “You said so yourself. You said we were destined for each other.”
“You’re not talking about our first meeting in this mountain,” Raven realized. “It sounds like you are.” She shook her head, trying to remember something just out of reach. “But you’re not.”
Her younger self clearly remembered a lot since childhood. No doubt everything she had forgotten after she was born. Because the first time she appeared to him pre-birth, she obviously knew more.
“You’re right.” Without a doubt, feeling his younger self’s emotions as clearly as she did hers, Tor remained close. His brows furrowed. “I'm referring to some time before that.”
She nodded, frustrated. It was right there beyond her grasp. Held back by her stubborn mind. Her irritating magic.
“I know I said we were destined for each other,” teenage Raven said. “But what if I was wrong?” She looked at him with her heart in her eyes. “Because shouldn’t we be able to touch by now? I’ve helped Trinity travel back to Vicar, and they can touch every so often.” An ethereal tear escaped. “But not us.” She shook her head. “Not once. Ever.” She touched where his hand was on her cheek. “I want to finally feel you. Smell you. Taste you.”
Raven tried to show no reaction to that, but her younger self's emotions washed over her too strongly. It had been one thing playing together as children. Another thing altogether getting older and not being able to do what a young couple should. Hold hands for the first time. Kiss on the cheek. The lips. The rush that came with all of those things. But, no, they had been denied it, and it had been torture. Absolutely awful.
Because shehadloved him. Loved him so much her chest squeezed, and her heart hammered. Almost as though she were that young girl again feeling all the physical emotions she had been denied. And with those feelings came certain knowledge.
Cian never stood a chance.
“Why fall for me, then?” She frowned at the wizard, positive they were connected enough that he followed her thoughts. “Why when you knew how much I loved him?” Then, because she was still mad at Tor. “Not now, but definitely then. The feelings I’m experiencing from my younger self more than confirms I’d loved Tor for as long as I could remember. Pretty sure way back to the moment I first met him before arriving here in the mountain as an unborn dragon.”
“Some things are just unavoidable,” Cian replied, more matter of fact than usual and less lovelorn than he’d seemed hours before. As if the more she remembered of Tor, the less hold she had over him. “The heart has its own mind.”
“Yet the tune of your heart changes more by the moment, doesn’t it?”
“We can only hope.” He nodded his head in acquiesce at Tor. “For I have no place loving you, Raven. Not when you already have a mate.”
“Very true,” Tor agreed, a little less growly than before. But then he probably sensed Cian’s waning interest in her as well. He was becoming less of a threat by the moment. “Because Ravendidlove me every bit as much as I loved her.”
“Yeah, think he got that.” Raven frowned at Tor in irritation even as her stupid heart somersaulted in joy. Fuckingjoy. When did sheeverfeel that emotion, and why now? Because a guy who loved her cheated on her but still said the words, so that made all the difference? Honestly, her younger self might have been all bright and shiny loving light to him, but as a rule, she preferred things darker.
“So, you like the idea of me loving you?” Tor said aloud, keeping things in the open when she’d much rather he shut his mouth. Amusement lit his eyes. “It makes you truly happy, and that’s unsettling.” He narrowed an eye. “I think you like the idea that you loved me too.” The corner of his lips curled up slow enough to let her know he had her pegged. “In fact, I think you might just be remembering how much you still love me. How much you had wanted to—”
He didn’t get the chance to finish his sentence before the memory yanked everyone’s attention back hard. How could it not, given what happened next?
