His voice is sincere, but as always, I check what his face and body are saying too. My grandmother taught me ‘a mouth can sing pretty lies that could fool angels, but eyes find it harder to hide the truth’. I hear lies daily; most of them from my own lips. So, I make a point of checking every possible tell before I take somebody at their word.
Dax’s sincerity plays out in every inch of him, from his unwavering gaze to the rigid stoicism lacing his muscles and even the way he leans toward me. Truth or not, he believes what he’s saying, and he wants me to believe, too.
“Tom said you’d been betrayed. He said you were in danger,” I remind him.
He draws back. His eyes flick from me to a bookcase in the corner of the room. The wry twist of his lips convinces me I’m about to be brushed off before he even utters a word.
“I’m always in danger, Jules. It’s part of the job when you swim with sharks,” he says enigmatically. “Don’t worry about it. I’ve got Aiden. I’m much more concerned about who hurt you. That bruise isn’t new, neither is the one at your hip.” He nods his head at the spot where my t-shirt has ridden up and I quickly yank it down.
“The Vale is a shark pool, Dax,” I continue his metaphor. “But while you’re swimming among sharks like a tourist with your Aiden-shaped cage for protection, some of us are frantically swimming to survive.”
“Who hurt you, Jules,” he asks. I should have realised he wouldn’t drop it.
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Itdoesmatter,” he snaps back.
Why? Why is he pushing this? I’m nobody. He’ll forget me in a day or two, so why make such a fuss when I clearly don’t want to tell him?
“No. It doesn’t. Telling you doesn’t stop this. It doesn’t make me feel better. Playing hero for five minutes and making all kinds of promises that you’ll never follow through on is no use to me. So, no. It doesn’t matter.”
Where I expect him to be insulted by my words, he only becomes more determined to prove me wrong.
“What if I’m the type of man to follow through?” he insists. “What if I can make it stop?”
Make it stop? For what? A minute? A day? This was myfather. My life. My way of protecting the kids—of breaking him in so they don’t get this treatment when they’re my age. That’s what the eldest does, right; smash the preconceived ideas of parenting? Break enough of the rules to make life a little easier for the ones who come after? Or is that another lie I tell myself? I can’t tell anymore; I’ve been saying it so long it’s probably true now.
Either way, I can’t let Dax help me if it means condemning Mum and the kids.
“Look. I’m fine, okay? It was my fault. Are we done here? I have hungry kids at home that really need me to earn their breakfast.”
“You’ve no food indoors?”
Fuck, why did I say that and how did he immediately jump to the right conclusion? How much worse can I make us look?
“Forget it. I need to work. You should probably leave now.” The belligerence in my voice almost has me wincing. He doesn’t deserve my rudeness.
“Fine. We’ll go but take this. I might need to check in with you and it’s easier and faster if you have a phone.”
Aiden hands me a turquoise phone that I take just to make them leave.
“Both Mr Nagano’s number and mine are in there. You can call me for anything and Mr Nagano for emergencies,” Aiden explains.
Dax shoots him a curious look. “You can call me for anything too, Jules,” he says while staring a hole in the side of Aiden’s head. Aiden’s lips twitch again. Is he annoyed or does he find this shitshowfunny?
“I’ll probably not need it, but okay. Done?”
“For now.”
I let them go downstairs before grabbing my stuff, locking the door, and following them down. Charlie catches my glower and looks suitably chagrined by my anger.
“I told you to mind your own business,”Koko grumbles at her and throws anI-told-you-soglare which makes me feel just a little better. At least he agrees with me on this one.
“She is my business,” Charlie grumbles back, but has the sense to leave it alone.
Dax doesn’t even pay them any attention. “We’ll pick you up after your shift.”
“No, you won’t. I’m going home. I have responsibilities. If you need me, you can call me.”
