“You know what I mean.”
“Mom had mentioned she and Dad used to come out here and do stuff like this. I figured it was shit you girls got off on.”
“How romantic,” I teased with my heart in my throat.
“Shut up.”
“Your mom didn’t think it was weird we’re going to stay out here?”
He grinned. “She thought it was sweet. Said she was gonna bug Dad to take her out dancing or something because they never do anything fun anymore.”
“So, c’mon. What happened with your dad?”
Instead of answering, he pulled out another blanket and draped it over us. I tried not to think about how close we were. How our heat mingled together underneath the fabric. It’d be so easy to lean over.
“They’re selling the land. The farm,” he said after a while, breaking me from my fantasies. It was as effective as an ice bath.
“What?!”
His fingers pulled at a string on the blanket. “Yeah, dad told me when we were out fixing the tractor. There’s some fancy big shot who wants to develop the land into a country retreat or some shit.”
“He didn’t give you a hard time about it, did he?”
I knew how much tension there was between the two of them. They tried to hide it, but men weren’t as subtle about their emotions. They liked to think they were all stoic and that women were the emotional ones, but it was the other way around. I wanted to reach for him, but I stuffed my hands between my thighs to keep from doing it.
“Actually, he didn’t…and that was somehow worse.”
“We’re a pair, aren’t we?” I wasn’t as good at lightening the mood, but he smiled anyway.
“Yeah we are. But enough about me. We came here for you. I don’t want you to beat yourself up about what happened. Andrew’s a grown man. You deserve better. When you find the right guy, you won’t be running away from him. The right guy will make you want to stay put. Your mom left you, your dad died. Everyone you’ve ever loved leaves you. You’re scared of having someone else do it, too. You think I’ve been here all these years and not noticed?”
“I—” my voice cut out and I had to turn away to keep from letting tears spill over my cheeks. How could he see straight to the heart of me so easily?
“Aw, fuck, Charlie. You know I hate it when you cry. I take it all back.” He tugged on my arm and pulled me close enough that he could wipe away my tears with the hem of his shirt. The familiar scent of his cologne wrapped around me on my next ragged inhale. I caught the barest glimpse of his abs which made all the emotion his words inspired clog inside my chest as a wave of heat swept over me.
Determined to ignore my response to him, I took several deep breaths to clear my head. “So you’re saying I should have stayed with him?”
“Hell no.” He sounded so offended I laughed. “If he was the right guy he wouldn’t have let you go in the first place. If you did run, he would have chased after you.”
“What about you?” If we had to talk about me any longer I’d go crazy. “I don’t see you running down the aisle.” It wasn’t just a diversion, I was honestly curious. Even if I wasn’t preoccupied with his mouth since the kiss, I knew he was attractive. There were enough girls always checking him out to clue me in if I’d been completely oblivious.
“I’m in no place to be in a relationship.” I’d be lying if I said my heart didn’t stop a little at his comment. But I was being silly. He was going to school, I was leaving. It’d never work. “Even if I could devote my time to her during vet school, I don’t want to be in a serious relationship until I’m situated in my career and stable with a steady income.”
“Is that why you rarely go on dates?” I asked.
“I date,” he said and pinched my waist. I smacked his hands away, but snuggled closer to listen for the rest of his answer. I didn’t even mean to do it, it was just habit. When he didn’t push me away, I relaxed, listening to the way his words reverberated in his chest. “I just don’t want to get serious yet.”
I found his hand and took it in my own. His long, capable fingers were warm and callused as they cradled my smaller ones. “But things will never be just as you want them, Liam. My life is a testament to that. Just as you think things settle down and you have a good thing going, it throws you another curve ball. I survived my mom leaving, and then my dad got sick. I survived taking care of him, and then he died.”
“You’ve seen how my parents can be sometimes,” Liam said after a moment. “The stress, the arguments.”
“They love each other,” I insisted. “People argue.”
“Sure they do, but it’s not always enough. They’ve struggled my whole life putting food on the table. Providing for me and my sisters. I don’t want a hard life like that for my family. I don’t want to become my father, busting ass every day for a job that barely pays the bills and then having to sell it just to make ends meet. Besides, could you imagine me settling down? I can barely commit to listening to one song all the way through.”
I laughed, then sobered. “Be serious.”
He sighed and closed his eyes. “C’mon, Charlotte, you know I’m no good at this emotional shit.”
