His hand trailed down my arm, pushed beneath the sheet covering my bare hip and cupped my ass. “You mean like this?”
“Yes,” I said on an exhale. “Please.”
His voice dropped an octave. “I love it when you say that.”
I strained upward until my lips reached his ear. “Please, Liam.”
He groaned and settled between my legs. “Whatever you want, sweetheart. I’ll give you whatever you want.”
He slid inside, and I gripped his arms. “All I want is you.”
An hour later,we were running very late to meet up with the girls, Dash, and Tripp for dinner and drinks. Since we all lived in the same building, we normally met at Ember’s place on the first floor since it was the most convenient. She’d offered to let me stay with her, but her twin brother and sister slept over her place as often as they did her parents. Ember had enough on her plate and I didn’t want to be a burden.
“Sorry we’re late,” I said as I stumbled into her living room, tugging on my cardigan sleeve and trying not to blush. Liam had done exactly as I asked and made me forget everything but him. “I was doing…stuff.”
Liam emerged from the door behind me with a self-satisfied smile on his lips. “I was stuff.”
I slapped him on the shoulder, then shoved him into the wall. I turned, sniffed, then said, “Did someone save me a slice of ham and pineapple?”
Ember and Layla shouted, “I knew it!” at the same time and Dash and Tripp shared manly grins with Liam.
It wouldn’t make our problems go away and we’d have a lot to talk about eventually, but for now, I had my friends and I had Liam and that was all I needed to forget everything else and lose myself in the moment for once instead of worrying.
Chapter Twenty
Liam
I leftCharlie in my bed the next day without waking her.
Not only because she looked so peaceful as she slept, but because I knew if I looked into her eyes I wouldn’t be able to do what I needed to do without feeling overwhelming guilt. But it didn’t matter. I still felt regret gnawing away at my insides like a cancerous tumor. I rationalized it by telling myself there was no use in bringing up the scholarship as my options were still wide open. The last thing she needed right now was for me to bring up that I was applying to veterinary schools out of state.
The ride to the library on campus took for-fucking-ever and gave me too much time to think. Too much time to remember how Charlie looked the moment she took me inside her. How she made me feel like I was the only man in the world, in her eyes. It was heart-stopping, the way she looked at me.
I used to think I knew everything about her. I could tell by the sound of her voice if she was happy or sad. I could read her like a fuckin’ book.
But the past couple days.
They’d been different.
They’d been more.
And it scared the fucking shit out of me.
It made me want things I shouldn’t want.
Things I don’t deserve.
She makes me want it all—with her.
I had to force all of it—including her—from my mind as I reached the parking garage for the library. The scholarship was for the University of California, Davis. It had been my first choice after the University of Florida. Or at least it had been before I realized how far away I’d be if I got it. How far away I’d be from Charlie.
I used to think being with Charlie was a simple as breathing. Now I realized it was so much more than that. Being around her was as essential, as life-giving, as necessary. The thought of losing her sent my body into an all-out panic. My chest ached and my brain screamed for just one more inhale.
I knew reality would return when deadlines for admission came, along with all my doubts, but for that moment, I wanted to breathe her in over and over, until she’s was as much a part of me as the oxygen flowing through my veins. I wanted to enjoy having her by my side for as long as I fucking could.
Each step I took through the cavernous lobby put more and more distance between me and the one person I never thought I could abandon. I could feel myself moving father and father away from her, but I knew we’d both regret it if I put my plans on hold. Despite everything that had happened, we both had a future.
As I sat at the desk to review my paperwork, I realized I’d never considered the fact that our futures might not be with one another. And that thought scared me more than it should.
