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His jacket was gone.
Then I saw the note on his pillow. The white paper had blended with the white cotton sheets so well that I almost missed it. I picked it up and it read:
Dear Jessica,
I love you. But I hate you. I love you for the innocent and vibrant young lady you were growing up. I love you for the way you’d look at me when you’d buy my pancakes and the way you’d kiss me once we were married. You always made me feel like it was only the two of us. Even after Pike arrived I felt like our days were our days. I love you for the good side of you that I feel only I was sometimes privy to.
I hate you for the mean spirited way that you’ve been lately. I hate you for the look on your face as you enjoyed hurting us last night. I hate you for the joy that you felt as you had sex with other men right in front of my face. For the way you choked on your own spit with that gag in your mouth last night.
I hate you for making me doubt myself. For making me doubt you. For making me doubt us.
I can’t love someone and hate them at the same time can I? I don’t think it’s healthy. I considered running away, leaving the Dove. But this is my home. I’ve lived most of my life here so I cannot leave. But I need to leave you. Consider this our divorce. I will tell the Seven that I thought I could see you with other men but that I cannot. And that I will go back to my single lifestyle. You are free to find another husband, one more fitting to your lifestyle.
Dominic
I didn’t remember sitting down on the bed but I was there, on my ass, when I finished the letter. I fell back and lay there for a moment staring up at the ceiling. What had I done? My hands shook. I was so mad. I can’t tell you now whether I was angry at myself or with Dominic. I don’t know, but I can tell you I was fuming. I think back then I was way too young and inexperienced and full of myself to admit that I might be the one who was wrong.
Dominic was a good man. I’d married one of the most decent men in the entire Dove community and I’d fucked it up all because I wanted it all…and I wanted it all at once. He would’ve been happy with his time on his day as long as I loved him, but that wasn’t enough for me, and now he was gone.
A part of me felt somewhat relieved. I had to wonder if I’d ever loved him in the first place. Maybe I’d simply liked the idea of him, the stability of having a man in the house who could cook and could clean and could recite sweet poems to me. He was the romantic one. Pike was the bad boy and Kent was the young stud. I no longer had stability. I just had two gorgeous men eager to fuck me every chance they could get.
And who the hell was going to cook breakfast?
Lauren was the one to let me know Dominic approached the Original Seven. He’d told them exactly what he promised. He said he was madly in love with me and needed me all for himself. That it would never work because he was too jealous. I cried in front of Lauren. I’d planned a fake cry but the tears burst out for real. She comforted me, just like a mother would and I let her, just like a daughter would. I suppose she always had the best intentions for me.
I had a month until Kent’s birthday, and Dominic had left me, which meant I was only married to Pike. Alone in our house, Pike fucked the living shit out of me. I’m not kidding. I don’t mean we had sex sometimes. I mean he fucked me in my room, he fucked me in his room, he fucked me on the dining room table, he fucked me in the closet, in the tub, on the backyard patio…everywhere.
And each time he did, I made sure he put it in my ass. I’m sorry to be so blunt, but it was a must. I loved it. I had to make sure he came inside my pussy because, after all, the whole point of all this was to get pregnant with a baby girl, but fun time before coming was spent in my ass. He’d claimed my ass and I knew that even when Kent moved in, and if I ever found a third husband again, I’d only let Pike have the ass. It was his.
Ass, ass, ass…have I said it enough?
Jessica’s Lament
News of my issues with one of my husbands traveled around the Dove quickly. For the most part, people in the community weren’t bad people. They weren’t out to hurt anyone. However, in a world where most of our leisurely time consisted of reading, theatrical plays, and procreation, chit chat was one more form of entertainment. So word got around.
Kent told me he’d heard the story from a friend. The story he heard was that Pike fucked me on Dominic’s day and that Dominic had had enough of my disrespectful ways. Wow. That wasn’t exactly how it had gone down. I felt like standing out in the center of the town and yelling, “Excuse me. It was my personal day and I fucked two other guys, not only Pike!”
My humiliation ended when a new story started cycling through town. Lauren was pregnant and the timing was right that it could even be possible that the baby was Alé’s. Everyone knew they fucked the night he was thrown out of town.
I wanted to kiss Lauren for cooking up a baby in time to save me from anymore town bullshit.
It was only two weeks till Kent’s birthday when yet another story made its way from Kent’s ears to mine. Dominic was already being claimed by another Dove. This one wasn’t a naïve little eighteen year old who didn’t know how to control her men. This one wasn’t an innocent girl Dominic had watched growing up and had fallen in love with. Instead of the shock of seeing such a young beauty corrupted, he’d go into his new relationship knowing full well what she was up to.
Who was this perfect match for my ex-husband? Why Gwenneth of course. She’d lost her whole family and only had Roscoe left. Roscoe and now Dominic.
I’d been braiding one of the young girls from the neighborhood’s hair when Kent told me the news. I began to twist her hair so tight that she whined and cried out for me to stop.
Dominic had every right to leave me. He was a sensitive man who needed the love and devotion of an understanding and nurturing woman…but not THAT floozy.
It didn’t matter what I thought about her. He requested the suitor visit like he was supposed to and he had his time alone with her in the cabin. It hurt. I’m not going to lie. I felt betrayed. Even after what I’d done to him.
The next day, he entered their house and wasn’t seen again.
No one else seemed to notice Dominic’s absence. Since marrying me, he hadn’t been out at his cart selling breakfast like he’d done back in the days. Sadly, Dominic was one of those guys who could go unnoticed for quite some time. And he had. I started spying on the outsiders’ house for a while. The blinds had all been drawn shut so there was no more peeking in on their sexual activities.
There was no peeking in on them at all. What was going on behind closed doors was a complete mystery. I saw Violet enter their house one other time. I couldn’t help wondering if Dominic had been invited in to that party. Who knows, maybe he’d realized his fondness of the group sex situation after leaving me.
Maybe he was the ringleader.
