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“Intense class,” he said.
“Yeah,” I agreed.
My potential lack of ability to hold back words frightened me. The wrong thing could be misconstrued or maybe he’d understand fully and that worried me even more. I wanted him but I couldn’t be with him.
“I wonder what they’ll have us do next,” Pasha said.
“I’m sure it will be interesting,” I said.
My eyes remained on my bottle of water, as if the small print on the label was so fascinating I couldn’t tear my eyes away.
“I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable in there,” he said.
Finally I looked up at him.
“You didn’t,” I said.
“I’ve never met anyone like you. You seem almost reluctant to do this stuff. Like it’s something you’re trying out instead of something you’re committing to. I noticed it in the last class.”
“I could say the same about you,” I said.
“Do you love your owner?” he asked.
“I do.”
“Do you?”
He’d repeated the question as if he didn’t believe me.
“Why did you ask me that again?” I asked.
He tapped on his bottle of water and then ran his hand up and down the length of it as if practicing masturbating. I don’t think he even realized he was doing it. His long hair hung in front of his honey brown eyes and I couldn’t stop myself from mentally pushing the strands aside and getting lost in them.
“I think I love my owner too,” he said, ignoring my question.
“That’s good,” I replied.
Silence. Then…
“This is fucking awkward,” he said, “Look, I like you.”
“I like you too,” I said.
I didn’t mean for it to come out like I liked him liked him, but more like I just liked him…as a person. His smile told me he’d read into it way too much. He reached out to take my hand but I pulled away. It surprised him and he pushed his hair out of his eyes.
“I understand,” he said. “I shouldn’t have said anything.”
He stood and slid his chair back.
“Wait,” I said. “Pasha. I like you too.”
He smiled at me and reached for the door.
“But I do love my owner. I really do. And the rules…”
“I understand,” he said.
All should have been well. I only needed to make it through the rest of the class since it was his last one. After that, I’d need to avoid the man altogether. Marco and Lilly totally fucked up my plans with one announcement. Lilly took her clothes off again and Marco followed.
