“I assumed we were done with lessons,” he said, sitting up, his hands gripping the wooden bed frame beneath him.
“I’m not here for lessons,” she said.
Dax’s feet were bare. His shirtsleeves were rolled up to his elbows again and the laces at his collar were loose. As if he found his clothes confining.
“Then what are you here for?”
Roa looked to his throat. As her gaze fell upon the shape of the key hanging there, she had a strange and sudden urge to tell him everything.
That, of course, was a terrible idea. It was the fastest way to seal Essie’s fate—not to mention her own.
The cost of treason was death, and Roa was certainly committing treason.
But the cost of not going through with the plan was Essie.
When she didn’t answer his question, he asked another one. “How is our friend Theo?” He looked down at the floor as he said it, avoiding her gaze. But she knew what he thought. She’d given him every reason to think it.
“Dax,” she whispered. “I don’t want Theo.”
When his face tilted up again, she saw the question in his eyes:Then what do you want?
Deep below the surface, something thrummed within her. Something she hadn’t let herself desire before. Because he was the enemy. Because he preferred Lirabel. Because Roa needed to save her sister.
Except... only one of those things was true now.
She hugged herself, suddenly afraid of her own conflicted heart.
Gathering up her courage, Roa moved toward the bed.
“I’m not interested in being one of many,” she said as she slowly stepped between his legs, which were bent at the knees. Dax’s hands tightened around the edge of the wooden bed frame. As if he didn’t trust himself to let go.
“Say you’re mine,” she whispered, staring down at him. “Or I won’t have you.”
He tilted his head back, raising his eyes to hers. “Who else’s would I be?”
She thought of his reputation. Of all the girls he gave his smile to and took into his bed.
“You’re the one who taught me to never reveal myself.” He let go of the bed frame, his gaze tracing her. “You taught me that once my enemy knows my weakness, he knows how to beat me.” His hands slid to her hips, bringing her closer. “So I hid my true weakness behind rumors and flirtations and decoys. Because if my enemies knew just how much she meant to me, they would take her from me.”
Roa frowned, her lips parting as she suddenly saw the game from his side of the board. Saw it clearly.
With his face turned up to hers, Dax said: “The only girl I’ve ever wanted is the one sleeping across the garden.”
Me?she thought.I’m his weakness?
The realization came with a rush of tender feelings.
Roa pressed him back against the bed. Dax let her. His breath hitched as she lowered herself over him, planting her hands on either side of his head, sinking down onto his hips.
Roa tried to separate out her purpose from her desire, but they were all snarled up together.
Knotting her fingers in his curls, she kissed him. He made a soft sound and reached for her, crushing her to him. He rolled her onto her back, then lowered himself down until their bodies aligned.
“Why are you really here?” he whispered, his eyes a storm of emotion.
She traced his cheeks—which were rough again. “Because I want to be.”
It was both the truth and a lie.
