Max smiled my way like this was a tea party and it was time for the door prize. “Who gets it, Mina?”
Now for my final scene. If this were a film—like Hearst said—this would have been the good part. As it was, I just wanted it to be over. I opened the blue book to the center and tore it in half, right down the flimsy spine. The front sheaf, I passed to Hearst. “Now William has enough to ruin you, Lolly.” The rest of the pages went to Louella. “And you have plenty on him.”
Louella’s mouth dropped open like a fish. Hearst’s face closed up in fury.
“What’s a little blackmail between friends?” Brody kicked in. He patted his pocket, where the most important page was safe and sound. “Remember now, kids, keep your promises.”
Hearst pocketed his half of the pages, stood without a glance at Louella, and stalked toward the door with Adams on his heels. Louella huffed, struggled out of her chair, and scurried out behind them.
“See you in the funny pages,” Max said to their backs. He grabbed my hand and kissed it. “We did it.” He smiled at me. “You were terrific.”
I let out a long, shaky breath. Sure, we’d done it. But the hardest part of my act was yet to come.
——————
Before I knew it, I was sitting in the roadster in front of my boardinghouse, saying goodbye to Max. Our last goodbye.
Problem was, he didn’t know it.
I’d always thought that love was hearts and flowers and happy endings. But real love, I guess, is more than that. Real love has to be wanting what’s best for the other person. Even if that isn’t me. And sometimes it hurts, real love. It hurts a lot.
After the show at the Derby, Max had ushered us out the backdoor and straight to the bank. It was Hollywood, so the teller hardly blinked as he counted out a thousand dollars to me. I handed Oscar the wad of cash. I wouldn’t think of Papa or Penny or the farm. This was for Roman and Angel. I owed them that.
Oscar looked at the bills in his hand like they were going to bite him. “You really doing this?” He looked at me like he’d never seen me before.
I nodded. It felt good, to be honest. Doing something right.
He didn’t ask twice. “Gracias, Minerva Sinclaire.”
“Go to the repatriation center,” Max told him, “and wait for me.” He gave him a stern look. “Do not talk to the agent without me.”
Oscar didn’t argue with Max, and I wondered if they had put Maria Carmen behind them. I hoped so. Max would need his family now that he’d made enemies like Hearst and Louella. And when I was gone.
Max helped me into the roadster. “You sure you want to go back to Lana’s?”
After what she’d done to me, he meant. No, I didn’t. But I wouldn’t be there long. “Sure I’m sure. Besides, she owes me.” And she’d help me out, if she knew what was good for her.
“I guess she does. But you could always come home with me,” he said, cupping his hand over mine. “Julia likes you.”
I didn’t answer. Couldn’t, really, with that lump like a boulder in my throat, and Max must have taken that as a no because he started up the engine and turned down Sunset. I laid my head back and watched him, trying to imprint everything like a film in my mind so I could watch it again later, after I left. Max’s voice, talking about who owed him favors. How I’d need to lie low for a few weeks. “You’ll see,” he said. “This town has a short memory. We’llhave you on the big screen before you can say William Randolph Hearst.”
I breathed in the smell of his fancy cigarettes and leather seats, felt his hand, warm over mine. I wanted to capture the moment to play again and again in the years to come. In the lifetime I’d spend without Max.
If things had been different, maybe we could have been happy together. If I hadn’t done so much wrong. But if I hadn’t done what I’d done, I’d never have met Max. Would I trade away those bright moments of joy to undo all the bad?
Like I said before, I just don’t know.
I knew one thing, though. The past didn’t stay in the past. It crept into every now. Whispered at every turn. Tinted every dream. Papa, Penny, Maria Carmen.
We pulled up next to the boardinghouse and Max killed the engine. I readied myself to say goodbye. But Max, he had to make it harder, downright impossible.
“Mina, I want you to know something.” He took my hand inhis.
I didn’t want to hear it, whatever it was. I knew it would hurt. And I was right.
“It wasn’t nothing to me, that night.” He turned my hand over and traced the line of my palm with his finger. “I was in love with you.” He raised those honey-colored eyes to mine. “I still am. If it matters.”
My heart fell to my feet and stayed there. It mattered. It mattered so much I had to say goodbye to him. He was a good man, Max was. He deserved so much more than me, my used body, my sordid past. A child that would tie him to me forever whether he wanted to be or not. Because one thing I knew about Max is thathe would do the right thing. The noble thing. He really was the hero of this story. I knew he’d say he wasn’t a hero, could hear his voice saying it. But isn’t that just what a real hero would say?
