Against my will, I smirk. “Well, I’m glad you did, too, I suppose.”
“Can we talk before I give you your gifts?”
The mention of gifts makes me bristle. Just like Kevin. “Yeah, that’s fine. You didn’t have to get me anything. I don’t have anything for you.”
“You’re here,” he says and sits on the couch. “That’s all I could have wanted.”
I pick the recliner to sit rather than take a seat next to him to give us space. As hurt as I am, being this close to him makes every nerve stand on end. I want him just as much as I always have, and I hate it. I wish I didn’t, but that’s a feeling that will probably never go away.
“You never texted me.”
Shaking my head, I frown. “What?”
“The voicemail I left after callin’ enough times to warrant a restrainin’ order asked you to let me know you’re safe.”
My eyes can’t meet his. “I, uh, never listened to it.”
“Oh.”
“I couldn’t. I didn’t know what you had to say, and I was scared. If it was a continuation of what you said outside the bar, I knew I wouldn’t be able to handle it. And I didn’t dare hope it was an apology, so I just left it.”
“Brynlee, I’m so sorry. I... There’s no excuse for the way I acted. If I wasn’t such an idiot, I would have just talked to you and solved the problem before it became one. My insecurities got the better of me, and I lost my mind. There’s no other explanation.”
Disappointment fills me because I hoped he’d tell me he loved me. That he wished he said it before I left, and he wants me to hear it now. That he wants to tell me every day until forever. But at this point, I don’t know if he’s apologizing to get me to stay and keep me as his friend, or if he wants to get back together.
“What happened, Rhett? I’m still… The whole time I was gone, I kept trying to figure out what flipped. I still can’t figure out why you changed on me the night before Thanksgiving. What did I do?”
“It wasn’t you,” he says quickly. “God, I hate that you think this was anythin’ you did. I—”
He stops and sighs like he’s wrestling with the words. Like he’s debating whether he should tell me the truth or a lie. I just want to know what happened to the man I fell in love with. Where did he go, and is there a chance of getting him back?
“I was at work that Wednesday, and I overheard my employees talkin’ about your ex. Some of the stuff they said about us got to me, and I looked Kevin up. When I did, I saw the weddin’ countdown with people still commentin’ on it.”
“That’s why you kept saying I was marrying Kevin?” I ask. At least that answers one of my questions. “I had no idea it was still active until I was in the kitchen talking to your mom. His mother didn’t let me have any control over the wedding details, and I didn’t know Kevin hadn’t told anyone I left him. But why didn’t you just ask me?”
His eyes shift to look at his hands as he fiddles with them in his lap. God, I miss his brown eyes. “Because I always expected you to leave me. In two days, I went back and forth between tryin’ to show you I could be the better boyfriend and then wantin’ to cut my losses to maybe save myself the smallest bit of pain when you left. I’d convinced myself that if I told you I knew, you’d leave me sooner. Talk about a spiral of terrible decisions.”
“I don’t understand why you don’t trust me.”
“I did. I do.”
“No, you don’t. If you did, you wouldn’t have assumed everything we shared was some type of fling before I married someone else. That was the final straw with Kevin. He cheated. Repeatedly. I would never do that to him or anyone else. That’s not trust, Rhett.”
He runs his bottom lip between his teeth before nodding his head. “I have no argument for that. I never looked at it that way. You’re right. You’re a hundred percent right. And I have no reason not to trust you.”
I’m not really sure what to say to this. Thank you?
“You were in Chicago?”
“Uh, yeah. I flew instead of driving. Figured it was safer that way. Did I give you enough money for the parts you ordered?”
Rhet runs a hand over his face before shrugging, his gaze still avoiding me. “I have no idea. The money’s still in the envelope in the kitchen. Did you go back to Kevin?”
The audacity!“Are you kidding me?” I ask and stand. “This was a mistake.”
“It’s just a question,” he says, chasing after me as I grab my boots. “I’m not accusin’ you. I just, uh, I need to know for my own peace of mind. Whether you did or didn’t doesn’t change how I feel about you. And if you did go back to him, I’d have no one to blame but myself.”
“And how do you feel about me, Rhett?” I stand with my boots in my hand. “Because all I know is that you told me I wasn’t enough, and now you’re accusing me of going back to my ex who I had to throw out of town. You never, ever trusted me.”
