“You and Savannah? Ben, that’s wonderful news. I’m so happy for both of you, and your mother will be over the moon.”
“And you’re not worried about my commitment or my resilience or anything else?”
He looked wistful, a feeling I’d recently become acquainted with. “I always worry about you and your siblings. But that’s not because I doubt you. It’s the price of being a parent. What I want most for you is happiness.”
I grinned. “I’m happy with her. I really am.” I glanced up at him. “You really think we’re that much alike, you and I?”
“Don’t you?”
“I guess so. It’s nice knowing you were a screwup, too.”
“You should have just asked your mother,” he said. “She would have told you that years ago. And she probably would have given you much better advice about your love life.”
Maybe. But deep down, I’d feared exactly the same thing my dad had. I couldn’t remember asking Savannah about her dreams that summer. How supportive would I really have been of them? Maybe I would have derailed her success. Maybe, in order to be with me, she wouldn’t have pursued building her own company at all. Now that she was going to rebuild it, I couldn’t think of anything better than being here for her. But I suspected twenty-two-year-old me would have been more selfish.
“I get it, Dad, I do. And I’m sorry for putting all the blame on you.”
“Let’s make a deal. No more nicknames other than Ben or son.”
I shrugged. “Or Purple Haze. I’d let you call me that.”
He gave me a quizzical look.
“Like the song by Hendrix,” I explained. “H-a-z-e instead of H-a-y-e-s.”
“I get it, but I’m never going to call you that,” he said, smiling. “Now, can I hug my son?”
I leaned forward and obliged, which gave me a chance to blink back tears.
We stood and headed back toward the water. We were both smiling now. I’d had no idea how much I’d needed this conversation, but Savannah had known. Her own hard-won experience with her mom had taught her that. She would get a great big thank-you from me when I got back to HEAT. That and anything else she wanted, and if she didn’t have a list, I had some suggestions.
“That’s the happiest look I’ve seen on your face in ages,” my dad said. “She really is good for you.”
“I think we’re good for each other,” I said. “And this was good, too. But not how I thought it would go.”
“Oh? What did you think?”
“I thought there’d be yelling.”
His eyes crinkled as he laughed. “I blame your Ranger training for that.”
I shook my head. “I probably picked it up before that, in basic. Fucking Army.”
He cleared his throat.
“Come on, Dad, you know I swear. And Mai and Michael do, too.”
He frowned. “I know it, but your mother doesn’t. Or at least she likes to pretend she doesn’t, so remember that Friday night.”
“Friday night?” I grinned. “Did I agree to something I’ve forgotten?”
“Your sister agreed for you,” Dad said.
I remembered last week’s team dinner when I’d suspected Mai was up to something. “I should have guessed.”
“But don’t hold it against her. She means well.”
“Trust me, there are worse things I could hold against her,andhold over her.”
