She nodded encouragement and waited for me to continue.
She’d been brave enough to tell me about her shitty breakup and the bad choices and heartbreak that had followed. The least I could do was man up and share a hard truth about my own past, especially since it was affecting our trip together.
I pushed past the squeezing pain in my chest and for the first time ever, told someone the whole story. “I was twenty-one years old, deployed to the sandbox. Afghanistan.”
“Wow.”
That was the easy part of the story, so I plowed on. “I told you my mom was a vocal coach and choral director. That year, she’d gotten a prestigious job directing Handel’sMessiahfor one of the big New York City choirs.”
“I love that piece.”
“So do I, although I haven’t listened to it since the night of her concert. It was being broadcast and we were able to view the feed. My whole battalion was there, and even though Christmas was still a week away, we made an early celebration of it. It was amazing. My mom was at the top of her game, and the cameraman even took a shot of my dad in the audience, beaming with pride. For someone who hadn’t been able to get home for Christmas for two years, it felt like I was able to be with them. I had no idea I’d never have that feeling again.”
Cara sucked in her breath. She didn’t take her eyes off my face as she waited for me to gather the courage to tell the rest of the story.
“My commanding officer woke me up a few hours after the party ended. Sending an emergency message halfway around the world to an undisclosed military location is quite the clusterfuck. By the time Lang told me my parents had been in a car accident, they’d already been dead for three hours. It had been the greatest night of my mom’s professional life. She and my dad had an amazing night together, surrounded by friends and colleagues. But by the time they left the reception after, the sleet had started. When they were ten miles from home, they hit a patch of black ice.”
I didn’t realize I was crying until Cara wiped a tear from my cheek and her own eyes welled up. I stopped speaking. I couldn’t go into any more details. None of them would change the end of the story anyway.
“I just needed you to know,” I told Cara. “Because of the way I reacted earlier, and because some part of me will always worry when someone I care about drives in bad weather. I also know I can’t protect everyone.”
“But you spend your life trying.” She laid her hand on my cheek. “Nick, you’re doing a great job of it. You’ve saved so many people over the years. I meant every word I said about you being a hero. But I know you don’t do it for the glory. You do it because you don’t want any other family mourning their lost loved ones over the holidays or any other day of the year.”
I managed a smile. “And here I thought I was doing it because I’m an arrogant asshole who likes the adulation.”
“Well, that, too.”
I laughed. That was one thing I loved so much about Cara. She made me laugh.
Everything changed then. The mood at the bar lifted but also, the burden I’d been carrying for twenty years lightened.
“Thank you for sharing that with me,” she said. “And thank you for not giving up on your trust in me.”
“I do trust you, Cara.”
“Is that all?” she asked.
I understood the question without her saying more. “No, that’s not all.” I swallowed hard, knowing I was about to cross the Rubicon. “I alsowantyou.”
“I know we both went into this road trip thinking we were too different, especially age-wise, to fall for each other.” She touched my jaw again, then ran her fingernails gently down my neck. “We were wrong.”
The shock of her touch made my dick twitch and my balls ache. I was nearly panting as I spoke. “I was lying to myself. Even that first night, I wanted you. It was all physical attraction at first. But then you turned me down flat, and you fought like hell at trivia. And then you followed me to the bar and made me laugh.” I traced my fingertips over her silky-smooth cheek. “How is it so easy for you to make me laugh?”
“You make me feel funny.” She grimaced. “That came out wrong.”
I laughed again. “I get your meaning.”
“Then again,” she lowered her voice, “you do make me feelfunnyin all my favorite naughty places.”
“Trust me, they’re my favorite naughty places, too.”
“But Nick,” she leaned toward me and skimmed her lips across mine in the sweetest, softest kiss, “with your constant reminders about our ages, I could almost see you writing the rules in your mind about me being off-limits.”
“Tonight, I’m too tired to care about the rules.” I leaned into her again, needing another taste. I caught her lips with mine, and we both groaned.
When we ended the kiss, her face was flushed and her pupils were blown as she stared into my eyes. “You’re probably so tired because it’s past your bedtime.” She grabbed my collar and tugged on it. “Do you think there’s any chance you can stay awake for another hour to help me break some of your rules?”
“For you, gorgeous, I’ll stay up all night and we’ll break them all.”
