“It wasn’t,” I assured her. “You heard Pasco. It was like a freak accident.”
“That accident put you—put us—in life-threatening danger. Whatever this mission is, whatever work you do with these people, isn’t safe. Being an artist trying to reach people online doesn’t mix well with...” She glanced around the empty, echoing space.
Not just anyone could walk onto a military plane and hitch a ride across multiple states. By this point, she had to be thinking I was involved with the spy world, or at least some kind of limited covert ops mission. She wasn’t wrong.
“I’m a subcontractor,” I said. “I do very little work with this agency. They only call me in when they need my specialized expertise.” Even I could hear hownotreassuring that sounded.
She pulled away from me. “Nick, it doesn’t matter. You’re mixed up in something that’s dangerous and I’m only making it worse. I can’t be part of it.”
The cold, hard truth was sinking into me. Now I was shivering, too. “Cara, I don’t want to lose you.”
“I don’t want that, either.” She sat up straight and pulled away from me. She glanced around the plane at the men in full-on tactical gear, then shook her head. “But an online influencer and some kind of super-spy? We both know it’ll never work. And we need to end it now, before we break each other’s hearts.”
CHAPTER 20
CARA
Several hours after a rude awakening, followed by a death-defying snowmobile chase, topped off with the bumpiest plane ride of my life, we landed at another military base. This one was in Maryland. Along with Lang’s team, Nick and I climbed into a large SUV. Despite referring to each other by last names, the men had introduced themselves to me by their first names. Thus, Lang became Logan. His colleague, Kyle, drove, Logan rode shotgun, and Ben and Ryan took up the second row. Nick and I sat silently in the third row, feet away and a world apart from each other.
An hour later, we pulled up in front of a typical-looking, four-story office building in the suburbs. Nick helped me step out of the vehicle and led me to the tinted-glass front doors while the rest of the team drove around to the back parking lot. The minute Nick and I stepped inside, into a corporate-America-looking reception area, we were greeted by Kat Hartmann, a pretty woman with long, red hair pulled up into a ponytail. Despite her unassuming outfit of jeans and a Christmas-green sweater, I knew from the way she carried herself she wasn’t the receptionist. I immediately pegged her as being in charge.
She asked me to sit in one of the plush seats in the waiting area, but I was too keyed-up to sit still another minute. Instead, we stood at the long counter, behind which a receptionist should be sitting, while Kat explained the paperwork she’d placed in front of me. I glazed over while she talked about NDAs and state secrets and Intelligence protocols. Nick touched my elbow.
“Care,” he said quietly, “I’m sorry, but you’ll have to sign these. The papers say you promise not to mention the details of this place or any of the earlier shitshow to anyone.”
“Ever?” I didn’t know why it mattered. Who would believe me if I did tell them? But it felt so final, like I was signing away the right to my own memories.
Kat touched my other elbow. “You’ve been through a lot, and I’m sorry for that. I take full responsibility for not protecting you and Roman better. If you do need to talk to someone, we have licensed therapists with security clearances.”
“No, it’s not that.” I didn’t know how to articulate my feelings, and I was so exhausted. Maybe if I did sit down, or if I lay down on the soft carpeting and slept for the rest of the day, I’d be able to think more clearly.
“I understand,” Nick said. “I’ve been at this for a while, and sometimes, it still scares the shit out of me. I’m so sorry you were exposed to any of it.”
“That’s the problem,” I said, finally understanding myself. “I don’t know whatitis.”
“And you can’t know,” Kat said quietly. “But what I can tell you is we do very important work here, work that protects the nation. What happened today had nothing to do with you and you’ll be safe now. Once you’ve signed the NDA, you’re welcome to stay on premises here or I can send you to a very nice hotel and assign one of our top female agents to stay with you. Either way, tomorrow morning, you’ll be free to continue on your trip home for Christmas.”
“You’ll be staying here?” I asked Nick.
He nodded. “I don’t have a choice. But you do, Care.”
“Then I’ll stay, too.”
Kat handed me a pen and led me through signature and initials blocks. Minutes later, she opened a door in the wall that had seemed intact and led the way into the facility of an agency she referred to as HEAT. We stood at one end of a huge gym full of workout equipment. There were offices, revealed by half-walls of windows, off to each side, and what looked like a kitchen and living room along the back wall.
“I’ll get you settled into your room,” Nick said. “You look like you could use a nap.”
I nodded.
“Good,” Kat said. “Then you’ll be rested for our holiday party tonight. Happy hour begins at 1800 hours. Sorry. Six p.m.”
I glanced down at my gray sweats, white tee shirt, and blue sweater, the only clothes I had with me. “I hope the dress code is casual.”
Kat grinned. “Don’t worry. We’ll find something for you to wear. If my size doesn’t fit you, Hayes’s wife or one of the other guys’ girlfriends might have something.”
“We can figure it out later,” Nick said. He glanced at Kat. “Third floor?”
She nodded. “You’re in 307, Cara’s in 308.” She touched my shoulder. “Right across the hall from you.”
