“Nothing,” I replied, clearing away some of the discarded plates.
“Doesn’t look like nothing,” she said, arching her brow. “You look like you want to cry.”
I swallowed hard, tears stinging my eyes.
She stepped behind the table and grabbed my hands. “McKenzie, what is it?”
“It’s Luca. He kept calling and texting me earlier. I finally answered, and he was upset. Something about some bad press. He said he needed me. He was begging me to go to him right then, and I kinda lost my cool. I didn’t mean to, but I was stressed and—”
“Hey, you don’t owe me an explanation,” she said. “I know you’ve been busting your ass all night. Did you try to call or text him back?”
I shoved my fingers through my hair. “I sent him a couple messages and nothing.”
Just then, Jen and Ravi appeared, concern etched into their faces.
“Oh God, you saw it, didn’t you?” Jen asked.
I shook my head. “Saw what?”
“The stuff about Luca,” Jen answered, but it came out almost like a question. “When we saw you over here upset, we figured it must be because you heard about it.”
My throat went dry. “Is it bad?”
Ravi’s throat bobbed, and I could tell by the look on his face that it was, in fact, worse than bad.
I released a shaky breath. “What have I done?”
“Listen to me,” Kia said, taking me gently by the shoulders. “Go to the back and try to call him. I’m going to get everyone out of here, and we’ll get this sorted out, okay?”
I nodded. “Okay.”
Jen was on my heels as I sprinted down the hall. Kia’s words to her guests were drowned out by the sound of my own blood whooshing in my ears. I was already dialing his number when Jen clicked the door to the break room shut, leaving only the sound of my heartbeat.
The call went straight to voicemail. I tried three more times with the same result.
This was all my fault. Luca needed me, and I drove him away, all because I was too fucking wrapped up in myself to just hear him out. I burst into tears, and Jen pulled me into her arms.
“It’s gonna be all right,” she said. “We’ll find him, okay? Just breathe.”
The doorto the break room opened and Kia appeared with Ravi close behind.
“Your coworker is out there packing up. I told her you’re not feeling well,” Kia said as she stepped inside and squeezed my arm. “Did you reach him?”
“No,” I cried, wiping my hands down my damp face. “It goes straight to voicemail every time.”
While I tried to call Luca, Jen gave me the abridged version of what was happening in the press. I knew her well enough to know she was choosing her words carefully because my mental state was already hanging on by a thread. But even as she tiptoed around the harsh reality of the situation, I knew it was far worse than I’d imagined. It was no wonder Luca was so distraught. People weren’t just coming for his reputation or his integrity. They were coming for blood.
“I didn’t even tell him I loved him,” I muttered. “When I got off the phone, I didn’t even tell him I—”
I choked back a sob. I was supposed to love him, protect him. And when he came to me, troubled and shattered, looking for support, I turned him away.
My mind went to Brennan and the days leading up to his death, replaying every moment on fast-forward. Had I pushed him away too? Had I really learned nothing after all these years?
“What if he…” I trailed off, unable to finish the question, yet it hung in the air like gunpowder after a shot rang out. I was standing in a room filled with people who’d lost the ones they loved most the same way I lost Brennan. “I have to go. I have to go now.”
“You’re not going alone,” Kia said. “I’m taking you.”
“But—”
