“When that happens, you’re supposed totalkto your therapist, not just up and quit.” Something flickered in her eyes, looking a lot like hurt, when she said, “We were supposed to be a team.” But it couldn’t have been hurt; Delilah didn’t get hurt. She was one of those rare types where shit just rolled off her back—always. Nothing ever bothered her. Nothing was ever wrong.
It irritated the shit out of me.
I lifted my head, shaking it. “I couldn’t talk to you, Delilah, that’s the whole issue. Not about this.”
“Why? Because I’m Savannah’s best friend? What’s so terrible that you think you can’t tell me? I’m treating Tess, and I don’t go spreading her shit. You should’ve heard what she just told me earlier, it’d make your head explode.” Well, now I was irritatedandworried about my youngest sister.
My sigh was heavy, defeated. “No, it’s not you. It’s me.” I knew she could keep a secret, or she never would’ve become a therapist. But there was something extra humiliating about explaining to your sisters’ best friend that you were terrified to love someone. Terrified of letting someone in and letting them down.
“Don’t feed me that regurgitated line of horseshit, Emmett. I’ve treated veterans before, and I know how to handle PTSD.I’m about to be treating ten of them in two months, in case you’ve forgotten.”
Restless energy sizzled in my veins. The muscle in my jaw ticked. “It’s not the PTSD,” I murmured. Even now, she was the only person I’d been able to outright admit to that’s what was wrong with me.
“Then what is it? Did you do something over there? I don’t understand why it’s so hard for you to just open up to?—”
“I want to fuck somebody!” I flew off the desk, arms spread wide. She staggered back, her jaw slack. “Happy now?”
“I…”
With every step I took toward her, she took one step back. “It’s beenthree years, Delilah. Three years since I’ve eventoucheda woman. Do you have any idea what that’s like?” Her back hit the wall, and she just stared at me, blinking quickly. In the nearly thirty years I’d known her, I’d never seen her so stunned.
“I’ll clue you in, it’s absolutetortureto want something so badly youachewith it, but you don’t trust yourself enough to do anything about it.”
Of course, this was the first time since I’d known her that she chose to keep her mouth shut, so I trudged on. “So you’re little hugging and shaking hands shit isn’t gonna get me what I want.” I pressed a hand against the wall next to her head, leaning in. “Not when I want a hell of a lot more than that.”
My chest heaved, each breath scraping in sharp and fast. Something spicy and sweet,seductive, hit my nose—Delilah’s perfume. Before I even realized it, I leaned in to smell it better, and my mouth watered. Her eyes widened. They were green and brown and gold with flecks of blue. Like looking up at the early fall sky surrounded by woods—forest eyes. I’d never noticed the mix of colors in them before, but I’d never been this close to her either.
Great. I was officially so sex deprived that I was losing it and finding something about Delilah, the biggest pain in my ass in all my life, pleasant.
But I didn’t step back. Couldn’t. Delilah was the only woman I wasn’t related to that I could tolerate being this close to. And I missed it—missed tracing the soft curves of a woman’s features with my eyes, feeling her breath against my skin, smelling her perfume…
“Touch me then,” she said, breathless, her gaze lingering on my mouth.
I froze, momentarily stupefied. I pulled away, not entirely, but enough to notice just how close I had actually gotten to her. It had been too close. Way too close.
“What did you just say?” The words came out deathly quiet. Stunned.Is this actually happening?
“If you want to get fucked so bad, then fuck me.” She licked her lips, and God fucking strike me down, I watched.
“You’re—” I forced myself away completely this time. Did she hear herself? “I can’t fuck you.” I started pacing, my hands in my hair.
She looked genuinely confused. “Why? I’m hot. I’m discreet?—”
I stopped in front of her, my hands falling to my sides. Was she insane? I couldn’t believe I was evenhavingthis conversation with her. “You’re my sisters’ best friend for starters.”
She arched a brow, smirking. “You didn’t deny that I’m hot.”
I’d never even considered her as more than my sisters’ friend. But yes, after she planted the idea in my head, Delilah was…probably one of the sexiest women I’d ever seen. And realizing it felt like how I imagined discovering the Earth was round felt.
Delilah was tall. Taller than any of my sisters. And she was broad, strong with toned muscles, but soft and curvy in all theplaces that mattered. She had a beautiful face, too. Soft, rounded cheeks, pouty lips, a button nose. And her hair, that wildfire hair…
I wanted to wrap it around my fist.
Fuck. Fuck.Fuck. I couldnotbe thinking about her like this. She was practically family. Savannah, in particular, would never forgive me. I staggered away from her, nearly tripping over a bucket of nails.
“Think about it and let me know what you decide,” she said casually. And there was the classic Delilah ‘nothing matters’ attitude. Tipping my world off its fucking axis like it was just another Thursday. Because to her, it was. She was a wrecking ball.
Came. Destroyed everything. Left.
