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He holds my body against his. "I can come back as soon as it's over."
"Right. Yeah. When is that?"
"Later tonight."
He promised me this day together and now he's leaving like it's nothing.
"And tomorrow, when you get a chance to play some corporate gig?" I pull away from his touch and plant on the couch.
Ethan turns to look at me. "No, I…"
He can't even promise he'll be here tomorrow.
"I thought things were going to be different. Why would they be different?" My voice gets soft. "I must be the stupidest person in the entire world."
He sits next to me on the couch.
I shake my head. "I guess it doesn't matter that I love you, does it?"
"Violet, I love—"
"Don't finish that sentence. It's only going to make this worse."
I believe that he loves me, even without him saying the words.
I thought that was enough.
But it's not.
I pull my blanket tighter. "I… I love you so much, Ethan. I was watching you at the show and my heart was so full it was ready to burst out of my chest. I could see all that happiness on your face. I could see that you were finally where you belonged. You love the stage. You love the guitar. You love Dangerous Noise. Don't you?"
"Yeah."
"I thought I was okay with that coming first. I thought I was okay knowing that music would always matter more to you than I did. But I'm not. I want you to look at me the way your friend Drew looks at his fiancée Kara. I want to trust you to keep your promises. I want to know that if you ever have to choose, you'll choose me."
He stares at me with all this hurt in his deep blue eyes.
The kettle whistles.
"I'll get that." Ethan pushes himself off the couch. He moves to the stovetop and makes me a cup of tea. He turns and presses his back against the counter. His eyes meet mine. They're still wracked with hurt.
But he says nothing.
I can only barely get the words out. "You're going to be late."
"Vi, I…"
He wants to fix this, but he can't. Neither of
us can. He's got the love of his life and I'll never be able to compete with his guitar.
His eyes turn to the floor. "I'm sorry."
Then he goes to the door.
And the door is closed.
And he's gone.
