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But that person can't be Piper.
This still can't happen.
I should pull back. I should talk to her less. I should encourage her to start dating guys from school.
I should certainly stop fucking myself thinking about her every night.
But I can't stand the thought of her with anyone else.
I can't stand the thought of my life without her in it.
I practically float off the stage. The last show of a tour is always bitter sweet, but this one takes the cake on sweet.
The crowd's screams flow to our spot backstage.
"Fuck, that was amazing." Ethan's eyes get lovesick. "How many days till I fly back to New York?"
"Still two." Joel plays irritated but his smile shows through. "Never thought anybody could be so annoying miserable and happy."
"Ethan's the annoying one?" Mal raises a brow.
"Excuse me?" Joel plays offended. He looks to me and calls me by the nickname Violet gave me. "Rhythmic One, back me up. Ethan's more annoying than I am."
"Tossing a coin won't break this tie." Ethan looks to Mal. "Admit that show was amazing."
Mal smiles. "It was good."
"Good? All I get is good?" Ethan shakes his head.
Mal chuckles. "It was great. You were great."
Ethan beams.
"You're not supposed to admit that." Piper moves out from behind a roadie. She winks at Mal then she slides her arms around Ethan. "Your ego is already so big, Ethan."
Ethan laughs. "It's not ego if I am as amazing as I think I am."
"See what I mean?" She looks to Mal then Joel then me. "He's awful."
I nod.
Mal too.
Joel gives Piper a once over. "Shit, where are you going after this?"
She does look amazing in her tight black dress. It's cut low enough to show off her lacy bra. Her hair is hanging over her shoulders in careful waves. Her makeup brings out her blue eyes and her soft pink lips.
Fuck, the places those lips could be...
"Isn't there an after-party?" she asks.
"You look cute." Mal hugs her hello. "But you can't stay too late. It's a school night."
She laughs. "I hate to admit it, but Mal is right. I have a test tomorrow. Anyone know where I can find coffee?" Her eyes fix on mine. "You have any secret java, Kit?"
Joel looks from her to me then back to her. Something flares in his grey-green eyes—some realization I don't like.
He keeps his voice even. "The hotel's around the corner. Some of the crew is already hanging out. Why don't you meet us there?"
