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"What good does that do me?"
"You get to escape into that world whenever you open a book."
"But that's not a job."
"Could be. You could be an editor. You're a smart girl. You'd be good at a lot of shit."
"Maybe."
"Maybe you're smart?"
"I'm failing out of law school."
"Cs aren't failing."
"You don't get it—"
"I get that you think anything less than perfect is failing."
I shake my head. "There's no way I'll pass next semester. Not with how hard I worked to get Cs."
"Do you even like law school?"
"I don't know. We can't all be rock stars."
He shrinks back for a second. Then he blinks and his expression is back to confident. "You'd hate being a rock star."
"Says who?"
"Me."
I say nothing.
"Deep down, do you want to be a lawyer."
"I don't know."
"I think you do."
"I think it's none of your business. If this is a fling, then why do you fucking care what I want to do?" I push myself out of Joel's lap and off the couch. "You can't do this, Joel. You can't pry me open if you're going to leave."
He looks up at me. "I want to help you."
"I've never talked about this stuff with anyone. I can't… if we're divorcing in five days… don't convince me I can trust you and rely on you if you're going to leave."
He nods. "Okay."
"Okay?"
"Yeah." His voice gets soft. "I like you, Bella. I want to help you."
"You're bossy."
"I know."
"I…" I'm fucking lost here. I like him too. And the way he's looking at me… it's like he's promising he's going to stick around.
Like he's screaming I don't want a divorce.
