“What did you say to him?” I asked. “Really, you’re not going to say anything after you’ve been looking at him like he’s dirt all day? Not to me?”
She remained silent.
More secrets and frustrations because of Dom. Why was I not surprised?
Rolling my eyes, I twisted back on my heel, careful not to trip over the rug in front of the door.
“Just don’t get into bed with him,” was all Celeste said.
I turned back, forehead creasing with utter confusion. Shock rippled through my stomach and must’ve been heard in my voice. “Seriously? First Lu and now you.” I rolled my eyes at Celeste. “Please—and I’m trying to say this nicely—stop. I know I screwed up, but not everyone needs to keep reminding me to keep it in my pants. I think I can handle it.”
“I’m just making sure you know.”
“I know.”
“Are you sure?”
I paused. My mouth opened and closed. How dare these well-meaning yet awfully pushy people I surrounded myself with?
“I’m aware now. I’m very aware that people are constantly keeping secrets and treating me like I’m going to fall apart.”
I reminded myself every day. Every time I walked in and out of the door. Every morning I woke up with him lying next to me, more than just a literal thorn in my side.
I was not going to sleep with him. I was not going to fall back in love with him. No matter how easily I felt like I could every day. I’d once thought love was never a choice, but now, I knew it was.
Because when push came to shove, it turned out, falling in love was the less painful option.
Celeste nodded, looking at least the smallest bit remorseful. “I know it’s not like a fairy tale.”
“I never expected my life to be a fairy tale, Celeste.”
“I know that. But it doesn’t mean we don’t wish for it sometimes. But that man in there is not your knight in shining armor. He isn’t even your knight in shiny tinfoil, okay? I just want you to know that because I believe you deserve someone who will give you the moon.”
“That’s an impossible ask.”
“For some, maybe.”
I stared at her, trying to take her words in. “I understand. I just wish everyone would quit having this conversation with me. You all are treating me like a child since I messed up and cast this hex curse thing—and then you all wonder why I didn’t want to come to here for help to begin with!” My voice rose, unable to hold itself back any longer.
Celeste took a step back, away from me, at the sudden change in tone.
“I’m figuring this out,” I told her.
“I know you are. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way. You know I didn’t.”
I gritted my teeth, already feeling the thick curtain of guilt sliding over me. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be,” Celeste said, certain.
At least one of us felt that way.
“I’ll see you at Beltane.”
“No sooner?”
I paused, running a hand through the ends of my hair before pulling it all behind my shoulders. I’d already told Lu that I would help her with things now that my new schedule had left me wide open. “We’ll see.”
Celeste gave a small huff, shoulders slumping. “This isn’t the time to turn your back on us.”
